Hard Rock / Palms Review

Hard Rock / Palms

While I've been to the Hard Rock numerous times, I've never been to the Palms. But in true Mitch Albom style, I'm going to just make up everything about the Palm. No, actually I'm only going to talk about the HRH, but I feel like they are the same type of hotel so anything about the HRH applies pretty closely to the Palms.

-The Scene
Clearly, the Hard Rock's strong point and will be addressed by the two major categories: celebrities and non-celebrities (the unwashed masses).

Non-celebs: There are few better places to go when it comes to amazingly hot chicks. It's funny, because you can tell that even the straight-laced chicks get a little crazy/slutty when they come here. Probably one of the best places to stand is in line for the bathroom where you can just watch the ladies walk by. The HRH is known around the country as THE place to go for a bachelor/bachelorette party and it shows. The amount of skin showing on the average Friday/Saturday night would make Hugh Hefner blush. (OK, that's a stretch, but you get the idea.)

Celebs: Recently known as where Paris & Nicole Hilton stay when they are on the strip. I was recently out there for a bachelor party and a friend was moved from his suite because it was Nicky's birthday party and they had reserved the entire floor. Of course, not all celebs are the same. During the same weekend, I saw Frankie Muniz (Malcolm, of Malcolm in the Middle fame) at the pool. All I can say is: worst...entourage...ever.

-The Gaming
Gaming at the HRH is generally hated amongst gamblers. The people are too stupid, too drunk and too busy fixing their hair (and that's just the guys). The gaming floor is 75% blackjack because the people here are generally too stupid to figure out anything else. You want a guy to stand on 14 against the dealer's face card? The HRH is the place for you. You want a chick to hit on 17 because she had a "hunch"? We got 'em lined up. If you get on a good roll in craps it can be hard to sustain because everyone's too stupid to know what to bet on and how to get their bets in on time.
However, because the clientele are limited when it comes to gaming, there opportunity for comps are better. While I'm sure that the HRH gets it' share of bigger players, most of the people who I know believe that they receive better treatment here than they would otherwise receive. That and they generally have better things to offer. The friend who had his room moved to accommodate Nicky's birthday bash received VIP entry and a table at her birthday party for four people. That's something that you're not going to get at the "All Suites" Rio...

-The Dealers
Usually young and good looking. Sometimes they even know what they are doing. Usually I spend almost as much energy watching them to make sure they don't make mistakes as I do with anything else. Not why I'm there.

-Sports Book
Almost non-existent. It's probably about the same size as the gift shop, but has less TVs. Again, not one of my favorite aspects of the HRH.

-Other (Pool, Shows, Clubs, etc)
The other strong point of the HRH. As I mentioned in the Mirage post, the HRH stocks it's pool with strippers and models. They often fly out from LA on the weekends to stay at the HRH and work at the various "gentlemen's clubs". They actually have something that looks like an elevated bed that are reserved for these "ladies" that serves to put them up for public viewing. I'd like to personally thank whoever was responsible for that one.

The HRH has a couple of clubs and restaurants, all of which are above average in my opinion. Mr. Lucky's, the 24-hr eats place is exactly what you need in a place like this. California-style diner food, it's great for 4am "dining". Nobu, the Vegas branch of the NYC sushi place is just as good as it's east coast companion (from what I hear) and similarly as expensive (typically ~$250/person). There is the compulsory steak house, the Italian place, and the casual Tex-Mex place (Pink Taco). All are acceptable, if not memorable.

The clubs are pretty good as well. The HRH gets pretty good acts to come through to it's club, The Joint. Notables include Metallica, Crosby, Stills, and Nash, David Bowie, Erykah Badu, Kid Rock, and others. It holds 1,400 and often spills out onto the main gaming floor.

In summary, the HRH hits what it's aiming for. If you are looking for the party scene, there are few better places. If you are looking to gamble, there are few worse.


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