Apr 30, 2009

They told me....

They told me that if I voted for John McCain, we'd have a vice president who was an idiot....

and they were right!

My God, someone should take him away during times when a glib comment can cause real harm......

Apr 27, 2009

Can someone explain this to me?

Who invented the idea of every pitcher only being able to throw 100 pitches? Why is it that every pitcher born around the globe is supposedly only able to perform for exactly 100 pitches? Why is that number magical? I know there is data to support guys that fatigue after x pitches, etc. But why is this only applicable in pitching?? And how is it the SAME FOR EVERY PERSON?

What if in basketball, data showed that players can only play 38 minutes a night, or a running back in football could only have 20 carries a game. See how silly this sounds?? Yet, in baseball it is the understood, gospel truth that a human being can only be effective throwing a white round ball of cowhide precisely 100 times.

Anyway, I'm glad that Eric Wedge subscribes to said dogma and yanked Cliff Lee in a 0-0 game. Snarkiness aside, if anyone has good reasons for this mad adoption I'd love to hear it.


Totally unrelated link. You MUST watch this it is beyond freaky (and yes its safe for work - not freaky like THAT!!!).

And after you watch the above video, you have to watch this spoof of the video, its ridiculously funny.

What that thing is able to do is amazing. Clone wars!!!

Random sports notes

1) Well, I know it's a bit late for a recap of the Blue Jacket's final game - but what a game it was to go out on. A 6-5 loss to Detroit because of a (cheap?) too many men on the ice penalty called with less than 2 minutes in regulation. Detroit then scored on the power play inside of a minute left to win. Great intensity to the game, espeically the third period, which was scoreless until the final goal. Got to see both sides play at their best on the offensive side, at least. The goaltending was shaky - disappointed in Mason, our goalie; I'm sure the Wings still have lingering concerns about Osgood. All in all, a great game in a great atmosphere.



2) It is a bit awkward and weird to be sitting on the bathroom toilet in the arena when the horn goes off. Yes, I cheered - is that the correct thing to do while on the throne?



3) At the 2nd intermission, Steve and I got hungry (even though we had a nice dinner at 5:30) and saw...Skyline Chili! Out to the concourse we go, and wjhile standing out there, we consumed two cheese coneys (cheese, chili, hot dogs and mustard) each. After 10 minutes, the floor around us looked like a four year old came through throwing shredded cheese around. We non-chalantly moved away and waited for someone to clean the evidence. It took a while......I wish I would have taken a pciture of the mess we made. Oh well, they were damn good.

4) Very happy with the Browns draft. Mack should be our center for several years (with Thomas and Steinbach, that's 3/5ths of a very good line) and we hope at least one of the receivers will pan out. And -according to Layup, and Ken Norton Jr., we got a steal in the "fourth" USC Linebacker, Maiava. Norton is quoted as saying Maiava is a better pro prospect than Cushing, Matthews, or that punk Maualuga.

( I have to hate him now that he is in our division. Yes, I wanted him with our 1st and 2nd round pick.)

5) Poll question for the blog: (I hope this doesn't get lost):

Who wrote the works of William Shakespeare?

(Not a trick question. I promise).

Apr 21, 2009

More political snippets

1) If the Republicans really want to be taken seriously, they have to pick their battles. Take this "handshake" flap that Obama has cuased by shaking Chavez's hand.

I understand the Republican's underlying pioint - that we shuldn't be chummy and friendly with dictators, especially with people like Chavez.

But - seeing the clip - what is Obama supposed to do? Chavez came over to within inches of him, handed him a book, and stuck out his hand. What, exactly, should Obama do? Ignore him and stare straight ahead? Push him away?

Creating a stink because Obama shook his hand when he obviously had no other choice is silly - and it undermines any legimitate criticism that the R's may have on future topics.

2) If banks take TARP funding to stay afloat, then they should have no choice but to accept the limitations placed on them by the government on topics like pay for employees, bonuses, and loan rates.

However, if the bank becomes solvent and would like to repay TARP funds (with interest), they should be able to do so at any time and "free" themselves of these limitations. Apparently, they are not able to do this as the government is not accepting their money.

If I was a bank, I'd call a press conference on the steps of a senator's office and wave a $100 million check around. "This check is for you, Mr. Taxpayer. Thanks for the timely help - now we want to pay you back your money with interest. Please urge your government to accept this as soon as possible!"

I'd also create a commercial with the same theme. Maybe this will put pressue on Geithner to accept these funds and to assure the American people that the government's involvement in how the banking companies are run is only temporary.

Apr 15, 2009

Tea, Lace, Wings, and Thee

Random comments:

1) What's a proper 13th anniversary present? Tradition dictates that a present for a 13th anniversary is lace. Is the present for a 14th anniversary Leather? Who wrote these rules, Don Henley and Steve Nicks?

I have a better idea....

MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL!

Now, how do I convince Janice of this idea - our 13th anniversary night (November 16) should be spent freezing in Cleveland watching MNF against the Ravens?

2) So, after all the whining last year about West Coast teams coming to the East and playing a 1:00 game....and their record being 1-15 or something......

San Diego comes to Cleveland on December 6.

And the game is schedule for a 4:05 start. Why? Give us the win, for God's sake, and start the game at 1:00. There's no reason for a 4:05 start. It's not a doubleheader week for CBS (else it would have been a 4:15 start).

3) The Jackets drew the Red Wings for the first round. Ugh. Would have preferred San Jose to Detroit. I originally wanted the #6 seed, but Vancouver (#3) is red hot and Detroi has not been stellar down the stretch. Columbus is +500 to win the series -wager $10 to win $50 if the Jackets prevail! You can still get the wager in!

4) Tea parties: Love the idea. I think the grass-rooted-ness of this movement is healthy. (These are the tea parties that occurred today across the nation - and for any of you that want to argue that Fox/Rush/Glenn Beck set these up, well, you haven't been paying attention the past few months. There have been similar rallies all over the place since the 2nd bailout; they just haven't occurred all on the same day).
I think the lack of fiscal discipline that we have seen in Washington over the past couple of years - both parties - have struck a chord. Just look at the bailout debate we had on this blog last fall. It seems wrong. Why are we rewarding that behavior? And the continued bailout and spending that we have seen this year is an extension of the entitlement attitude.

I think this will manifest itself in the 2010 elections. The Republicans better capitalize on this by finally turing their party over to the less-government, libertarian wing....and this means less government on the social side, too. The only way the Republicans can shape this movement into a tidal wave is to talk the talk of lower government, but also walk the walk by extending that limited government philosophy into all areas on policy - especially on social issues. That will truly send a message to independents that the party is changing.

Apr 14, 2009

Happy Schedule Day!

Tonight, the 2009 NFL Schedule is released to the world. Fanatics like me can start planning their Sundays in the fall and determine which Sunday (out of 17) will be the one where the most chores will be done around the house.

What am I expecting for the Browns this year? Well, not much. I would like to have one Monday Night game this year - but I'm not counting on it. If you look at our 5 prime time games last year:
- 3 went down to the wire (Pit, @Buf, Den)
- 1 was a fantastic upset that the NFL world was talking about the next day ( NYG)
- 1 was probably in the bottom 5 of all Browns games I've seen on TV in 20 years (@ Phi)

So - for the most part - we entertained in our Prime Time games last year. Maybe - maybe? - they will throw us a bone and give us an early season MNF game? Say, home vs. Minnesota in October? Over/under for Peterson's rushing yards in that game: 241.5.

Two things to look for in the schedule:
- We go to Detroit this year. The schedule maker can't be THAT cruel and make that Game 1 of the season, right? Will the Lions get their first win in 2 years against us?
- There should be a law - any game involving two cold weather, outdoor teams should be played in the winter. 4 years ago, Cleveland went to Green Bay - and it was a game in Week 2. The temperature was 80 degrees at Lambeau. I sweated my ass off. (But -we won! I've held that over Packers fans here for 4 years!)
I order the NFL to have the Green Bay at Cleveland game be in December.

And, of course, what game will Dad take Freddie and Warren to this year? The rules, as always:
- No division games (except maybe for Cincinnati)
- October or early November (no 90 degree or 20 degree games)
- 1 pm Sunday start

I'm predicting a Oct 25 game vs Jacksonville. Tickets for that should be plentiful.

Apr 8, 2009

Carry the Flag!


The official NHL team of Layup's Bachelor party is in the playoffs!
2nd home game in Columbus, here I come. (thanks to Steve)
Now you all will be subjected to Stanley Cup playoff blogging for April.....and May?......dare I say, June?

F&J Editorial: Masters pick

In the 2005 US Public Links Qualifier at Jester Park GC in Des Moines, IA, 30 people played for 1 qualifying spot. I was paired with a hot shot high schooler from Des Moines for the 36 holes. I went out and did not break 150; I think I shot something like 154 or so. The 17-year-old junior started off slow - I think he shot 74 - but caught fire at the end and finished with a 68 for his second round. Unfortunately, it was 2 strokes too many, and he was "rewarded" with being the second alternate from the qualifier. Needless to say, he didn't make it to nationals.

http://www.usga.org/news/qualifying/2005/qualifying_apl.html

Since then, that high schooler went to Michigan State and now is in the field this week at the Masters. Jack Newman won the 2008 US Public Links Championship and is playing.

It's easy to root for Tiger, Phil, Paddy, or even Freddie, but if you spent 36 holes with someone in the past - and see them now on the national stage, well, you've got to pull for them.

We wholeheartedly wish Jack Newman the best of luck this week and hope that he shocks the world on Sunday. Hmmm...it's strange....there are no odds listed for him on VIP. I wonder why?

Apr 7, 2009

What did/did not work

While the 13-year old Leland checks with his 17-year old senior friend Wiz to compare notes and check whether it's "cool" to blog, I thought I'd post a list of things from Vegas this year that did and did not work.

What did work
- Not golfing first thing Thursday morning. Heck, not golfing on Thursday
- Getting in at a reasonable hour on Wednesday (say, 7 or so) instead of 11
- Shaking hands with everyone at 9:20 am wishing all a "Happy NCAA Day"
- Medium-priced dinners (Del Toro, Dos Caminos)
- Pai Gow Tiles
- Ultimate Poker
- Triple Action Blackjack (that game will keep me up nights this year as I think about that more and more)
- Blackjack Switch?!
- The Cabana (I don't care what any of you say, it's great to get away outside for a day)
- The Saturday night $25 Craps run - slowly becoming a tradition
- Most blackjack cards
- Newly-vacuumed craps tables
- Playing craps at the end of the table with the dealers on your left
- A massage. I need to have one earlier in the trip.
- Marquette stepping on the end line
- Mirage Sports Book
- The Tournament Preview that arrives on Tuesday - and the tradition of reading the book on the plane Wednesday afternoon
- The Breakfast burrito
- Eric's rule: 2 drinks for Eric = 7 drinks for Mer. I can hear Kermit complaining now, but geesh, I average maybe 1 drink a week during the year. Tops. So 2 drinks will affect me as much as 7 for a socialite like Kermit.
- The 6 am flight coming back. I recovered well from the trip. (As well as can be expected)

What did not work
- Going into the office on Wednesday and getting all stressed before vacation
- Staying at one place, gambling in another
- Having some members of our party staying at another hotel (I felt guilty not hanging out with Kermit more on the trip)
- No Women's lines.
- No TV's near the gambling areas of the Mirage
- Morel's. If we're going to do a steak dinner, then we go to S&W. Period.
- The lines at the Palazzo sports book. Awful. The clientele is terrible.
- Pai Gow Poker.
- (hoo boy) A second round of golf? Did anyone miss it?
- Downtown during the day. Wow. Depressing.
- The Sahara. Explain again why we went there? Oh yeah, the fire bet....
- Casino Royale on a Friday night. My God, I was the oldest one there (well, second oldest, as Kermit was with me....)
- The dimensions and dice at the IP
- The music in the Palazzo elevators. Did not create any sort of adrenaline rush.
- No NyQuil. Dammit Eric, pack NyQuil next year so you sleep better.
- Tom Collins. Boy, it failed me at the tables on Thursday and Friday.
- In N Out Burger. There. I said it. I'd rather have a Rally Burger any day.

Apr 5, 2009

Interpret this one...


So my dream the other night involved me playing craps by myself in Vegas - at the Mirage, I think. (It certainly didn't look like the Mirage, however). I started betting the horn - and winning! - and then pressing, and winning!

By the 5th or 6th horn roll in a row (where I had $25, $30 on the horn) where I won, the dealers/pit boss were trying to freeze me. They would inspect the dice, stall in passing the dice over to me...it literally took 2 minutes between rolls as they tried to freeze me. I was "hot".

No matter. I kept rolling the 2s, 12s, and 3s - and my "Horn High Ace Deuce" kept hitting. Several bystanders came up and was perplexed, since I kept losing my pass line bet but was celebrating like Amy Alcott at the Dinah Shore.

Oh yeah, one more thing. They paid me in Monopoly Money. I distinctly remember being handed a blue $50 bill after one of the hits.
We need more Vegas recap posts - Wiz ? Leland? I need to put up a summary of what did and did not work on the trip - sometime later this week.

Apr 1, 2009

So - is this item in stock yet?

I'm not sure whether this is better or worse than Stadium Mustard, but it will be an essential item in the Zahn kitchen....

http://www.thinkgeek.com/stuff/41/squeez-bacon.html

I love Technology

I realized a couple of weeks ago I was falling behind in technology. My wireless and wifi laptop was no longer able to keep up with my needs. So last night I purchased an iphone. Tried out the Verizon Curve and it really was a piece of crap. So for $50 more, why not get the iphone. This will allow me to finally do the following:

  • Stop using the company dime for my personal cell phone use. I average around 500 text a month which is costing the company some extra money. Also my Internet usage is pretty high on my phone which is even worse.
  • Gambling: First thing I did on my iphone was set VIP sports as my home page. I am now fully operational. No longer calling Eric to place my wagers during the week. Also I will be able to load up the Wizard of Odds website and play craps in the middle of my interviews or meetings now.
  • Fantasy Baseball: Loaded up and ready to check box scores and everything for this season's
  • Email: Now I will be able to check my email during the weekend, which has always been bothering me.