Rules of crying

When talking with Eric the other day, he mentioned to me that he cried a little when the Cavs won the East. First, why are you so excited since they haven't won anything yet, and secondly why are you crying???? What is happening to our society where it is respectable for men to cry. I have men in my office crying because work is too tough, I see my sports heroes crying from time to time as they retire, and now my own brother???? Next you are going to tell me that I will see my Dad cry this fall when he finally has to put his lawnmower to rest.

Anyway, I have created three easy rules on when it is acceptable to cry:

1. When someone close to you dies.

2. When your kid is born.

3. When your team wins a championship.*

*Only OK if you are over 30 and this is your first championship with the team or if there has been over 30 years between championships. So when the Cavs finally win the Championship, it is OK for him to cry. When the Sox and the Pats won the championship, it is not OK for Jay to cry, but it is for his dad. Got it? Good. And one last thing, you have to do in the comfort of your own home, by yourself, in your basement.

Then I thought, what happens if your team losses. Well I have never felt like crying before after a super tough loss. All I have felt in the past was pure anger. I was so angry I could punch a baby and walk away happy. And I could always hear a little voice in my head saying "Good, I can feel your anger. I am unarmed. Take your weapon. Strike me down with all of your hatred and your journey towards the dark side will be complete"


Anyway...what about athletes? I hate it nowadays. Why is Lebron crying? Why are all of these coaches crying? The only time I feel like it is acceptable is when an athlete or a coach who has been with a team his entire career brings home a championship towards the end of his career. I'm just tired of all of this shit. Am I the only one? Have I posted about this before? I'm out.