Thursday, March 14
The last time I checked the clock, it was 2:00, and I drift off…..
I wake up….seems dark outside….. it’s 2:30. Crap.
2:30 turns into 3:00, which turns into 3:30. No dice. I am wide awake. I surf the net and get aggravated with the horrid wireless connection, and at 4:00 sharp I send out the golf side pool update. I actually do some work before I give in around 5 and head back to bed.
At 8, the alarm goes up, and a rush of adrenalin goes through me- it’s Southern Highlands day! This has become a mainstay tradition for the trip – a golf round that I think about at least 10 weeks in advance.
I actually played well on this round, even though the score did not show it; I limited my losses to Wiz (and was finally man enough to swallow my pride and take strokes from Wiz). And – finally – I played the 18th without picking up in the middle of the hole.
I broke out my Rickie Fowler gear to the group; I’m starting to love the Puma shirts that he wears – which should come as no surprise to this group. The problem is, I was unsure of what shorts go with the paint splatter on the shirt; I chose a dark tan, conservative color and got roundly booed. Yes, I could have worn white shorts – or maybe I just go the whole hog and buy white pants. Maybe next year.
(Layup insisted that I wear khakis to match the shirt; he has a point. I pulled out some khaki cargo pants to wear later on in the week for a day lounging in the casino; he pointed to them and said: “See? You should have worn those golfing with that ugly shirt!”
Cargo shorts at Southern Highlands. I will stop listening to Layup for fashion advice now.
Anyway, the gambling day started off good with the sports bets while I was on the course. In the 1nd round of the A-10, I had Charlotte +4.5 vs. Richmond. The score was stuck on 63-60, Richmond, with 0:10 left on the clock…..and our phones did not update for a good 10 minutes. What the hell was going on?
Then we get the cryptic, crazy play-by-play updates from the phone:
0:06: Charlotte FT good
Then we get the cryptic, crazy play-by-play updates from the phone:
0:06: Charlotte FT good
0:06: Charlotte FT good
0:06: Charlotte FT good
0:06: Charlotte FT good
0:06: Charlotte FT good
Next thing I know, Charlotte is up 2. They end up winning – somehow – by 5, in a game that was talked about all night on ESPN. Here’s the game recap.
It was a good morning in the book; we came back to the casino where I rested a bit; Layup and Wiz went to a massage, Leland went God knows where, and Don/Mike napped. I spent most of the late afternoon in the book, seeing the results come in (and they were favorable today!) as well as finding games to wager on, including 2nd half wagers. Everything seemed so clear that day….why is Tulsa an underdog at home? Why is New Mexico St only a 5 point favorite? Western Mich is only up 2 at half over Eastern – and the 2nd half line was only 3? I’ll jump on the Broncos….
And most – not all – started hitting. I did miss on some very easy money on the Clemson/Florida St game; I did have Fla St on the game; Clemson led by 5 at half and the 2nd half line was Fla St -4 ( I think). That was a gimme. That was the Mirage saying “come to the book and pick up your free money”. Wiz got in on it, I missed it, and Florida St ended up winning by 5.
Finally met up with the group at the UTH table; 4 of us were hungry and the other two (I’ll let you guess) went to the Salon. We went to Japonais where I got up at least two (probably three or four) times to head to the book for late action; scores were coming in and they were very profitable; I didn’t want to waste this hot streak, so I plowed the profits into later investments. Washington/Oregon over. Hawaii 2nd half. UT-Arlington. All came through. My entry for our group parlays were winners, but the best we did on the 2 that day were 4-2.
In short, I was up 16 units in the book, which was a record day for me. It was one of those days where everything you saw made sense; you didn’t waste bets on random games (like I tend to do), and things were clear – very much like a golfer in the zone.
The night was spent at craps – again – where Leland had the field rolls going and then a long UTH session; it was good to sit down after running about 2 miles in the casino that day back and forth from the book. I headed upstairs at 2 as another golf round awaited in the morning.
Next thing I know, Charlotte is up 2. They end up winning – somehow – by 5, in a game that was talked about all night on ESPN. Here’s the game recap.
It was a good morning in the book; we came back to the casino where I rested a bit; Layup and Wiz went to a massage, Leland went God knows where, and Don/Mike napped. I spent most of the late afternoon in the book, seeing the results come in (and they were favorable today!) as well as finding games to wager on, including 2nd half wagers. Everything seemed so clear that day….why is Tulsa an underdog at home? Why is New Mexico St only a 5 point favorite? Western Mich is only up 2 at half over Eastern – and the 2nd half line was only 3? I’ll jump on the Broncos….
And most – not all – started hitting. I did miss on some very easy money on the Clemson/Florida St game; I did have Fla St on the game; Clemson led by 5 at half and the 2nd half line was Fla St -4 ( I think). That was a gimme. That was the Mirage saying “come to the book and pick up your free money”. Wiz got in on it, I missed it, and Florida St ended up winning by 5.
Finally met up with the group at the UTH table; 4 of us were hungry and the other two (I’ll let you guess) went to the Salon. We went to Japonais where I got up at least two (probably three or four) times to head to the book for late action; scores were coming in and they were very profitable; I didn’t want to waste this hot streak, so I plowed the profits into later investments. Washington/Oregon over. Hawaii 2nd half. UT-Arlington. All came through. My entry for our group parlays were winners, but the best we did on the 2 that day were 4-2.
In short, I was up 16 units in the book, which was a record day for me. It was one of those days where everything you saw made sense; you didn’t waste bets on random games (like I tend to do), and things were clear – very much like a golfer in the zone.
The night was spent at craps – again – where Leland had the field rolls going and then a long UTH session; it was good to sit down after running about 2 miles in the casino that day back and forth from the book. I headed upstairs at 2 as another golf round awaited in the morning.
Friday, March 15
More jet lag and trouble sleeping; I finally fell asleep at 3 and woke up around 7:30. And I hurt. The lack of sleep over the past 2-3 days started to really catch up, as any adrenalin from the trip is now gone. I was physically sore and mentally grumpy; but the show must go on.
The first order of business was to place the day’s parlays for the group. In the next hour, we got picks from 5 of the 6 in the group; I was waiting on Wiz. I’m standing in the sportsbook waiting to place the bet whenever Wiz’s text comes in.
I call him – no answer. Text – no answer.
Leland tries – no answer.
Now, apparently, Wiz may have been working, but there was plenty of advanced notice for this pick. Finally, after about 10 minutes of waiting – Wiz’s pick comes in; it’s the same as someone else.
We go through another round of calls – no answer; emails – no answer; texts – no response. Another 10 minutes goes by as I am waiting in the book.
Now, apparently, Wiz may have been working, but there was plenty of advanced notice for this pick. Finally, after about 10 minutes of waiting – Wiz’s pick comes in; it’s the same as someone else.
We go through another round of calls – no answer; emails – no answer; texts – no response. Another 10 minutes goes by as I am waiting in the book.
Wiz finally responds to texts, picks another game that’s already taken, and then his third choice is acceptable. So that’s 25 minutes or so of valuable time in the morning wasted waiting for Wiz’s pick.
Needless to say, I’m not in the greatest mood as I head to the valet station to get in the car. As soon as I see him, I start loudly complaining at him as he lights into me. We verbally go at it, artificially creating a scene in front of the Mirage for a good 2 minutes – half in jest, but half giving him crap for his stunts.
We get to the course – Spanish Trail – and check in at the clubhouse. We were there as guests of a Shufflemaster executive, register at the pro shop and expect to pay the greens fees.
“Yes, guys, you will be teeing off in 30 minutes. The rate is $59”.
There’s dead silence for all of us for a good 15 seconds.
“Did you want me to double that rate for you?”
We were all stunned at the low cost for the round. Yesterday’s round at Southern Highlands was $400 – and everyone agrees it was worth every penny. Now here we are at a private club paying one-sixth that.
The golf was horrible; I was in no shape to stabilize my body on the lack of sleep; the whole round was spent sliding all over the place during the swing. I did birdie 18 after hitting driver off the deck on the tee box – it was the only way I knew where the ball was going.
The drama, however, was with the parlay. My pick was Tennessee -1.5 vs Alabama. I have faith in Cuonzo Martin! The picture of the entire ticket is at right.
(and, just for history’s sake, here’s a link to the scoreboard that day….)
On the 5th green, the finals from the Indiana (Don) and St Louis (Layup) game came in about at the same time; we were 2-0. By the 8th hole, NC State (Wiz) was well on top and cruising; Wisconsin (Leland) was hanging tough with Michigan. On the 10th tee, my game was tipping off; Mike’s game – Southern Miss – would not start until about the 14th hole.
On the 11th hole – the NC State game went final. 3-0.
On the 5th green, the finals from the Indiana (Don) and St Louis (Layup) game came in about at the same time; we were 2-0. By the 8th hole, NC State (Wiz) was well on top and cruising; Wisconsin (Leland) was hanging tough with Michigan. On the 10th tee, my game was tipping off; Mike’s game – Southern Miss – would not start until about the 14th hole.
On the 11th hole – the NC State game went final. 3-0.
On the 14th – The Wisconsin game went final – that’s 4-0.
My game was at halftime, with Tennessee losing; the last 4 holes with most of us watching the phones. Wiz started texting me “Roll Tide” messages and yelling it from the group behind. On the 16th hole, Tennessee made a run to close it within 4…..
….and never got closer. 4-1. At that time, Southern Miss got out to a 15 point lead.
We had lunch at the club house (where we declined – declined! – a free round of drinks from John Esposito, only one of the 10 most famous gamblers in Vegas) watching the rest of the Southern Miss game – and my fate was sealed. I was paying for dinner that night. Everyone in the group wished we would have split the $4800 – except Wiz, of course.
Now I was pissed. An evening massage helped; and Lavo was the dinner that night – so at least I knew I would get a good meal out of it. The staple courses at Lavo: the giant Kobe bef meatball; Chicken Parmiagian, and (of course) the deep fried Oreos.
Well, after that, there was no way we were going to be able to sit down – so off to the craps tables where we could feel like exercising (standing) while playing. That’s when we encountered THE WORST craps dealers in the world. Dealers that kept asking “who’s bets are these?”. Dealers who did not pay the come bet off (just the odds) when the come bet hit. Absolutely annoying. And the table was moderately hot, too! That’s a horrid tug of war that goes on in your mind.
After picking up, it was time for the first foray into the Salon. It was about 10, 11 pm on a Friday night. Wiz, Layup and I head in there , we find an open table and start playing. It immediately goes south for me, as this 6’2” dealer from Bulgaria – Svetlana – starts dominating me. It wasn’t utter destruction, but it was a steady, unmistakable losing streak.
About halfway through the session, we see a group of African-Americans come in. There was one….three…..7…..12……at least 20 of them. They all gather around a table on the other side – and it seems that there are 3-4 people actually betting; the rest are crowding around the table watching and hovering. The group was at least 2 rows deep standing around the table.
Light bulbs started to go off in our heads as we tried to figure out what was going on. That weekend, the Mirage hosted a birthday party for Rob Kardashian – and there was the mom, Kris, sitting at the table. It looked to us like they were betting $25 chips….which is less than the minimum in the salon.
That’s when things started to get chaotic. People from the Kardashian started roaming the Salon. Checking in at each table, heading from one table to another by cutting through the pit, etc. There was one member of the gang who was a guy, but – I swear – looked like a 15-year old girl with a slight moustache. He had a 5’11” leggy model in a low cut dress in tow.
My game was at halftime, with Tennessee losing; the last 4 holes with most of us watching the phones. Wiz started texting me “Roll Tide” messages and yelling it from the group behind. On the 16th hole, Tennessee made a run to close it within 4…..
….and never got closer. 4-1. At that time, Southern Miss got out to a 15 point lead.
We had lunch at the club house (where we declined – declined! – a free round of drinks from John Esposito, only one of the 10 most famous gamblers in Vegas) watching the rest of the Southern Miss game – and my fate was sealed. I was paying for dinner that night. Everyone in the group wished we would have split the $4800 – except Wiz, of course.
Now I was pissed. An evening massage helped; and Lavo was the dinner that night – so at least I knew I would get a good meal out of it. The staple courses at Lavo: the giant Kobe bef meatball; Chicken Parmiagian, and (of course) the deep fried Oreos.
Well, after that, there was no way we were going to be able to sit down – so off to the craps tables where we could feel like exercising (standing) while playing. That’s when we encountered THE WORST craps dealers in the world. Dealers that kept asking “who’s bets are these?”. Dealers who did not pay the come bet off (just the odds) when the come bet hit. Absolutely annoying. And the table was moderately hot, too! That’s a horrid tug of war that goes on in your mind.
After picking up, it was time for the first foray into the Salon. It was about 10, 11 pm on a Friday night. Wiz, Layup and I head in there , we find an open table and start playing. It immediately goes south for me, as this 6’2” dealer from Bulgaria – Svetlana – starts dominating me. It wasn’t utter destruction, but it was a steady, unmistakable losing streak.
About halfway through the session, we see a group of African-Americans come in. There was one….three…..7…..12……at least 20 of them. They all gather around a table on the other side – and it seems that there are 3-4 people actually betting; the rest are crowding around the table watching and hovering. The group was at least 2 rows deep standing around the table.
Light bulbs started to go off in our heads as we tried to figure out what was going on. That weekend, the Mirage hosted a birthday party for Rob Kardashian – and there was the mom, Kris, sitting at the table. It looked to us like they were betting $25 chips….which is less than the minimum in the salon.
That’s when things started to get chaotic. People from the Kardashian started roaming the Salon. Checking in at each table, heading from one table to another by cutting through the pit, etc. There was one member of the gang who was a guy, but – I swear – looked like a 15-year old girl with a slight moustache. He had a 5’11” leggy model in a low cut dress in tow.
What the hell is going on here? Wiz yelled more than once.
The Kardashian clan stayed there for about 15 minutes – no more – and I assume they went back to the clubs for the party. But the damage was done to our group. We were all off kilter.
I was near the end of my stake – three chips left – and on tilt; I decided to go all in. I got dealt 20, but the dealer had an ace. I have a policy to take insurance if I have a 20; the idea is that the worst I can do is break even on a good hand. But my whole stake was already in play.
“You don’t have enough for insurance!” Wiz laughed out loud. That made me more determined. Looking back, I did have the funds in my wallet if I wanted to – but I was stubbornm or forgot about it.
You can guess the ending – the dealer pulled the face card. Wiz laughed some more as I stormed away from the table. I did hear him say something like “I’m not laughing at you”, but after the Alabama shenanigans, he lost any benefit of the doubt.
Ended up at the craps table again, where I watched a obscenely drunk man roll dice all over the place; one of every 2 rolls had to be called back since it was short, in the chips, or off the table. Had a miserable UTH session, and found myself ending the day at Pai Gow with Leland and John with a cast of characters; one of them was a 40-something teacher from Minnesota who was drunk but was flirting with John; another was an angry 20-something Asian-American girl from Seattle who asked me where I was from.
I said, well, I live in China right now.
“Well, I think you live in the land of bull shit!”
Um, nice to meet you too, bitch. It was time for bed after a rough day.
The Kardashian clan stayed there for about 15 minutes – no more – and I assume they went back to the clubs for the party. But the damage was done to our group. We were all off kilter.
I was near the end of my stake – three chips left – and on tilt; I decided to go all in. I got dealt 20, but the dealer had an ace. I have a policy to take insurance if I have a 20; the idea is that the worst I can do is break even on a good hand. But my whole stake was already in play.
“You don’t have enough for insurance!” Wiz laughed out loud. That made me more determined. Looking back, I did have the funds in my wallet if I wanted to – but I was stubbornm or forgot about it.
You can guess the ending – the dealer pulled the face card. Wiz laughed some more as I stormed away from the table. I did hear him say something like “I’m not laughing at you”, but after the Alabama shenanigans, he lost any benefit of the doubt.
Ended up at the craps table again, where I watched a obscenely drunk man roll dice all over the place; one of every 2 rolls had to be called back since it was short, in the chips, or off the table. Had a miserable UTH session, and found myself ending the day at Pai Gow with Leland and John with a cast of characters; one of them was a 40-something teacher from Minnesota who was drunk but was flirting with John; another was an angry 20-something Asian-American girl from Seattle who asked me where I was from.
I said, well, I live in China right now.
“Well, I think you live in the land of bull shit!”
Um, nice to meet you too, bitch. It was time for bed after a rough day.
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