Sam we have a problem

Wow.  Less than a week til Vegas and I'm already amped up!!! Not too sure why its starting this early.  Maybe its due to living in KC where the weather has been brutal and there really isn't anything going on. Maybe its my job situation where for the first time I hate what I do and the kids are driving me absolutely nuts.  Or it could be for the first time I feel like I'm being treated like I should be treated by a casino.  In November Carol and I went out for a 48 swing to the Mirage and I applied for a credit line.  It was a little bit of a hassle but in the end it worked out and I used markers the entire trip.  Went on a spectacular losing run (Carol and I got clobbered in the Salon) that resulted in 5 outstanding markers.  Paying them off was very simple and everything worked out well in the end. 

So I called last night to make sure my markers were set for this trip and the conversation overwhelmed me.  Mr. Zahn, everything is all set.  Hope things have been going well since the trip here in November. See here that your wife was just here. Hope she had a great time.  Your limit is "x" and you can just go to the tables when you arrive and start playing.  See you in a week.  Wow, they know me.   Awesome!!!  

With the marker system in place its time to put together my budget and strategy for this trip.  Recently Eric and I were discussing the scene from Casino where Joe Pesci was playing BJ.  Here is the link.  No better way than to use those quotes to discuss what might happen during this trip and outline a plan. 

Sam we have a problem:

So I  found an additional $5k in a savings account labeled "Vegas" that I must of set up last year or the year before that I totally forgot about.   It was in with the kids college savings accounts, so I'm not too sure what my thinking was back then, but who cares now.  A little surprise money that bumps up my bankroll to the largest its ever been.   

We made out like we didn't know who he was:

To Don and Mike seeing me coming up to the UTH table taking a $1K marker and not saying a thing. UTH is the one game that makes me think I truly have a serious gambling problem.  I lose ALL the time and it makes me angry playing, but I seriously can't stop playing the game.  And to make matters worse, Carol told me that they have opened up a 3rd UTH table at the Mirage.  Ugh...  I seriously don't know what to do with this game.  I can't 86 myself from the game since I know I will sit down on more than one occasion to play.  I might just stick with playing table mins and just set a loss limit and call it a day. 

Ohhhh no: 

I love how he sounds here.   And that's the sound Eric will make when he realizes that Wiz and I aren't there to pick him up at 10:00pm on Tuesday night because we are playing roulette at Terribles Casino next to the airport. Wiz and I on the same flight to Vegas can only lead to bad things when we are the first folks into Vegas.  

How the fuck can you grin? How the fuck can you grin?:

To E for the crazy prices they are charging us for our dinner.  I learned early on never to doubt Don on his dinner selections (Mesa Grill vs Applebys) and early indications it will be outstanding, but the bar has been set very high sir. 

Look at this fucking beaut they put in now:

To all the craps dealers at the Mirage.  You can't tell me they all don't look like this guy.  And they are going to love me with my new rolling style.  I tested out a new roll and a new strategy over the weekend at Hollywood.  During this test session, two other guys were next to me all trying new systems. It was the most fun I had at a craps table without any of the regulars.  Wiz, we also had that young female dealer that was so jumpy when we threw her chips about a year ago.  She is now a pro.  Very impressive.  

Sherbet (?) send you in to knock me around now? You've been knocking everyone's dick in all night:

To the nasty and rude UTH dealers. Screw them.  

Take this king and pound it up your ass. Take this one and stick it up your sisters ass:

5-6 years back I gave up BJ because of a massive run at losing.  I feel that same way now about my craps roll and BJ.  If my new crap strategy doesn't get returns and I go into a quick funk in BJ, I might be playing PaiGow the entire time.  

That's right, keep looking at him you fucking dumby:

What we are all going to be doing when Ira convinces us to drink those monster death drinks downtown again and we all black out.  Did we get the shroom shot added to our drinks last time, because it seemed like we all went on our own very interesting journey for the next 6-7 hours.  Some of us ate deep fried twinkies while others sought to find the meaning of life from a lady named Giggles.  Are we going to be that dumb again?

Nicky you're not listening to me. I'm here to help you. What's the matter with you. You're going to burry us both. 

What Lee will say to Wiz and I again as he picks us up from the Nugget. 

Just give me the money. The fucking money Sammy.

What I'm most worried about is getting burned in the Salon early on in the trip resulting in me asking Eric for a loan on top of the loan I already got from the Mirage.  The Salon scares me not because of the limit, but because how nice it is in there.  With Carol last November, we hung out in there, smoked a free cigar, drank some nice scotch all on the house of course.  Difficult to just leave that atmosphere and return to playing even $25 BJ tables.  But I know that I can't just set up camp there and I need to be reminded of that.  

10 and that's it:

The best line and hand gesture of the bit.  And that's the budget I'm hoping to stay within.  

Craps: $5000

BJ: $4000

Pai Gow: $500

Roulette: $600

UTH $1000

What are you staring at you bald headed prick?

If my budget above is shot, I'll be stuck playing electronic craps, where I was able to win $20 last year.