NFL Week 5: MGM Grand

It's bye week for the Browns after laying a stink bomb last week vs. the Titans. 60 passes for Colt for 350 yards - 60! - breaking the franchise record. We dominated time of possession, but trading FGs for TDs early, and key defensive breakdowns bring us to 2-2 at the break.

Talking about breaks, the one Vegas casino that I take a relative break in is the MGM grand. Many years, we have a dinner at this casino, and we spend the hours before and after the dinner gambling at that casino. Most of the time, I don't gamble as much as other casinos. I hate the layout and the warehouse-like feel of the place. It's impossible to find an afforable craps game - I think there are more craps tables at the Monte Carlo than the MGM.

The dealers are excellent, but the limits are just too high. I just don't want to put in a long session on a Saturday night at the MGM. The one exception, of course, is if they bring back the "Card Sharks" game.....then maybe I will ask for the limits to be raised to $100.....

I've played BJ there for a limited bankroll; played higher-limit Pai Gow Poker ($50) for little risk - but nothing major. It's a nice place for taking a breather, for people watching (especially the people in this group), for light sports wagering - and not much more. A bye week during a typical Vegas trip.

On to the games:

Phi 31, Buf 24. OK, one last game to think that the Eagles will turn it around. And how good are the Bills, really? They beat an imploding KC team, won in a shootout vs. the Raiders, beat the Pats, but lost to the Bengals. So if they play a team with any semblance of defense, they will lose.

Pit 24, Ten 17. I think the Steelers are out to prove something here.

NYG 31, Sea 10. Seattle, on the road, in a 1pm game.....vs the Giants with a good pash rush. Hmmmmmm......Seems too obvious.

Min 20, Az 17. Two teams that can't close. No idea here - except that there will be a lot of mistakes.

Jax 23, Cin 13. Gut feeling - Jax's offense is slowly getting better with Gabbard, and Cincy's offense hasn't done much.

KC 24, Ind 17. I think Painter comes a bit back to earth here for this game.

Car 27, NO 24. All right, yes, I am a sucker for the Panthers.

Hou 27, Oak 24. This one should be decided by a field goal.

SF 24, TB 13. I don't think Tampa is all that good. They can't score if they play a semi-tough defense.

SD 30, Den 23. Denver's defense is the worst in the league. The question is - will the Chargers play down to the competition, again?

NE 30, NYJ 27. The Jets are struggling on offense - and that's fine here, since the Pats have no defense! I think this will be a shootout, and the Jets will stop the Pats just enough to make it close.

GB 30, Atl 28. Atlanta's stand here. They have got to show something here to give them confidence going forward.

Det 28, Chi 16. I think the Lions will come out firing immediately and get a huge lead on the Bears right away.

Best bets: 14 of them. Last week: 11-6; overall: 38-23-5

Phi -3
Pit -3
NYG -10
Az/Min under 45
Jax -1
KC +2
Car +6.5
SF -3
SD -3.5
Den/SD over 45.5
NYJ +7
NYJ/NE over 51
Atl +5.5
Det -5

Week 4

This week's picks:

NO -6.5
NE -4
Arz pk
SD -7
Ind +10

Next stop: Vietnam

Tomorrow we are leaving for vacation (yes, another week-long Chinese holiday week); we are heading to Vietnam. 3 days in Saigon, and then 3 more in Nha Trang, a beach town.

We already have some tours lined up in Saigon - we will be seeing the Cu Chi tunnels, going to the War Museum, and some other city sightseeing. I don't think the tunnels will faze me too much - it will be interesting to see the network of tunnels that they built during the war. However, the museum may be too much. Most of the reviews that we've seen about the museum say that they are incredibly biased. I'll see how long I can stay in there before walking out.

And then, of course, Sunday night at Midnight, I will be on my slingbox watching the kickoff of the Browns game in the hotel. Is this what we envisioned as a future life in Vietnam 40 years after the war? We are fighting so that Americans can watch the NFL whenever, whereever they wanted in Vietnam?

NFL Week 4: Oneida Casino

Well, the Browns are 2-1....and I really have no idea what to expect from this team. Are they good? (not in a Packers-good kid of way, but maybe Falcons, Eagles, or (dare I say) Steelers way - average to slightly better-than-average?) Or are they lucky and not very good at all? Yes, they have only beaten the Colts and Dolphins....but look what happened when Pittsburgh came to Indy. No one is putting the Steelers 20th in the power rankings.....

Anyway, I don't know what to expect from this team. We're 2-1 for the first time since - 2002. 9 years ago. We are veering a bit from our comfort zone here. And if somehow we can win vs. Tennessee, that means we are 3-1 at the break. I'm not confident, however; Chris Johnson has got to get untracked at some point and our run D is not good.

Speaking of moving out of the comfort zone, every young engineer in Tissue Towel that cared any bit about gambling had a trip to the Oneida casino in Green Bay. I still remember my first trip there fairly well. (And no - surprisingly, it was not with a fellow engineer that had multiple projects in Green Bay at the time...his name was Don).

I went with two other older engineeers in 1998 - it was a Monday night during football season. The Packers were not on. We went to one of the multiple $5 blackjack tables - all the $3 tables were full - and I sat down with $20.

I was not comfortable. It was not Vegas, and it was not my hometown Argosy. Were the rules different? (no) The players? (yes) The drinks? (no alcohol).

My $20 lasted 1 1/2 hours. My two fellow co-workers, who both busted out after about 15 minutes, were amazed. How in the hell did I make it last that long?

I think I have made at least 10 trips there during my time in Tissue Towel. The atmosphere at the casino would make Steve, Layup, Wiz, and others crazy. The age limit is 18 - so 18 year old are playing at the table with me. Let's just say the quality of play sucked. And since the age limit was 18, no alcohol was server. A bunch of high school seniors, drinking Mountain Dew and playing blackjack with me. That's Oneida.

On to the games!

Chi 23, Car 13. Back and forth on this one. I don't think Carolina has played a good defense yet this year.

Stl 23, Was 20, OT. A pure letdown pick after the Skins loss (but cover) on Monday night.

Phi 24, SF 16. I can't figure out the Eagles just yet.

Min 24, KC 20. I think Peterson will get the carries he dserves in the 4th quarter to seal it.

NO 26, Jax 13. With Gabbert, I think the Jags are one of the 3 or 4 worst teams in the league. And the Saints realize they can't slip up and fall to 2-2.

Hou 31, Pit 23. I know, I know, every year I say that BOTH Baltimore and Pittsburgh can't be good. I was wrong last year. I don't think I am wrong in 2011. Pittsbrugh can't run, and they can't stop a pass rush. A one-dimensional team can get to 8 or 9 wins, but not much more.

Dal 24, Det 20. Gees, if the Lions win THIS one, when is the letdown ever going to come?

Buf 20, Cin 17. The Bengals have a defense - but their offense won't be able to score enough.

Sea 26, Atl 20. Maybe these Falcons are not as good as advertised. (And that would make Browns fans extremely happy, as we own their #1 draft pick next year).

Az 27, NYG 20. Letdown, plus Fitzgerald vs. the beat up Giants secondary.

GB 28, Den 20. What's the motivation here for the Packers to go all out for this game?

SD 30, Mia 13. I think last week was the last straw for Sparano - the players are giving up.

NE 34, Oak 23. The Pats after a loss? I wouldn't want to be this team. And if the Pats lose? A lot of reevaluation will be going on.

Bal 29, NYJ 20. This game will have a lot of passing yards, and therefore a lot of scoring.

Tam 21, Ind 17. I can't see Tampa scoring enough to pull away.

Best bets: 17 of them. Last week: 9-8. Overall: 27-17-5.

Chi -6
Car/Chi under 42
Stl +2
NO -7
NO/Jax under 45
Hou -3.5
Pit/Hou over 45
Buf/Cin under 43.5
Sea +4
Atl/Sea over 38
Az +1
Den +12
SD -7
NE -4.5
Bal -3
NYJ/Bal over 42.5
Ind +10

Week 3

The picks for week 3:

Cin -2.5
Phi -6.5
NO -4
Ind +10.5
Was +4.5

Back to Civilization?

I was fortunate enough to spend this week in the US (in Cincinnati) for the company Modeling & Simulation meetings. I spent Sunday with Layup, watching the NFL games at BW-3's for 6 hours. Having breakfast, snack, and lunch at BW-3's right off the airplane did not do good things for my stomach. It did not take all that grease kindly.

Layup is a wonderful good luck charm when watching the games. If he goes to the bathroom, it's a guarantee that something good will happen to the games we wagered on. He missed 2 Tampa Bay TDs in the can, and missed 2 Dallas TDs in the afternoon. He was also taking a piss when Romo completed the long pass in overtime.

I am finding myself becoming more Chinese, bit by bit. Some examples:
- when paying by credit card, it is now a habit for me to hand the card over with 2 hands (a very Asian custom).
- I went to McDonald's; the bill was $5.27. I didn't have a $5 or $10 bill, so I handed him a $20 and a $1. He looked at me like I was on Mars. This is standard practice in China.
- He asked if this was for here or to go. I said "it is take away" - exactly the broken English that is used everywhere in China.

I got to see my parents on Monday and Janice's brother on Wednesday - where a fully loaded duffel bag full of clothes and other goodies were waiting.

I'm heading back home tonight - and probably will see sights like those in the picture above as soon as I get in. This picture is taken on the sidewalk on the street in front of our complex.

See the man by the tree? He has picked up his son by his armpits - and, yes, those are the kid's legs dangling in the air.

And yes, the kid's pants are pulled down to his knees. I hope the dad brought some sort of toilet paper.

NFL Week 3: Casino Royale

While we were reviewing the games this week, it was apparent quickly to Layup and I that there are several "trap" games on the schedule. Trap games are those where the superior team (on paper) should easily win - but the line is set at a place where everyone thinks it's too low. This usually happens when the favorite is the road team. Most analysts and bettors quickly look at the line, scoff at it - and jumps quickly on the favorite. By Sunday afternoon, it's clear it was a trap as the bettors lick their wounds.

I don't think there is a better definition of a "trap" casino than the infamous Casino Royale. Everyone know this place - right across the street from the Mirage, proudly advertising "$5 craps with 100 x odds!" - and on weekdays the limits could be even lower! They also have Blackjack switch!

More than once in Vegas, Layup and I have been bored - so we have the great idea to go to the Casino Royale. "C'mon", we say to each other. "How much trouble can we get into there? We'll roll the dice for a while - it's a $5 table! How much can we lose, $150??"

Two hours later, we struggle back into the daylight, absolutely beatne to a pulp. "What happened? 15x odds on the point of 8 sounds like a perfect idea!"

I think my career losses at the Royale are greater than losses at other, well known Vegas casinos, like the Luxor, Aladdin, TI, and Excalibur.

It was also the start of the Blackjack Switch love affair for our group. I remember one trip going, with Wiz, Layup, me, and maybe Jay. Layup was deathly ill (as usual) and sneezed and coughed all over the cards. He was sitting right next to Wiz - and Wiz was none too happy with this. Every cough made Wiz slug Layup in the arm, tellin ghim to get his "God damn saliva off of my cards". Of course, Wiz got sick later that week. *

* - maybe I have mis-remembered some (or all?) of the details. I'm sure I will be corrected in the comments.

Anyway, I think we are done with Casino Royale trips for the foreseeable future. How long can that casino, on a prime location on the strip, still be in business?

These are tough games this week - be very careful when wagering. Don't fall into the Royale traps.

NE 34, Buf 23. I'm too lazy to go against the convention wisdom for this game here. NE will be up by 10-17 all game, and Buffalo will score late to make it closer.

Cin 24, SF 13. The Bengals are an OK offensive team. The 49ers are not - and the Bengals defense is adequate.

Ten 23, Den 13. I was surprised to see the Titans stop the Ravens last week.

Det 20, Min 17. Casino Royale Game #1! Detroit has to come back to earth sometime, right?

NO 34, Hou 27. Who has Houston played? A shell shocked Colts team, and Miami at home. They have not been tested yet.

Phi 27, NYG 16. The eagles were moving the ball even with Kafka back there at QB.

Car 27, Jax 13. I think Cam keeps it going, although this could be Casino Royale Game #2.

NYJ 23, Oak 20. Casino Royale Game #3. This will go down to the wire and be decided by a field goal.

StL 24, Bal 20. Casino Royale Game #4. The Rams are desperate and at home - and won't self destruct like they did Monday night.

SD 31, KC 13. Not much to say here. The Chiefs offense could be the equivalent of the 1999-2000 Browns offense.

GB 20, Chi 19. Casino Royale Game #5. Should be a lot closer than people think.

Arz 20, Sea 17. Casino Royale Game #6. Seattle was playing a desperate Pittsburgh team last week - now they are at home facing a weak Arizona defense.

Atl 20, TB 16. I just don;t like Tampa's M.O. of falling way behind early.

Pit 24, Ind 20. Casino Royale Game #7. Indy is improving since thir world was rocked before the season started. They still have offensive weapons - Addai, Wayne, Clark. I'm not predicting a Colts win, but I think it will be close.

Dal 24, Was 23. Dallas just is not that good.

Best bets: 17 of them. Last week: 9-4-3; overall: 18-9-5.

NE -7
Cin -2.5
Den/Ten under 42.5
Det/Min under 45
NO -4
Hou/NO over 51.5
Phi -8
Car -3
StL +4
SD -14.5
Chi +4
GB/Chi under 45.5
Az/Sea under 43
Atl +1.5
Atl/TB under 46
Ind +10
Was +4.5

This week

The picks this week:

NO -6.5
Jax +9
TB +3
Dal -3
Atl +2.5

NFL Week 2: Argosy Casino

This week, the Browns go to Indiana to play in a new, pristine stadium that has been built in the last 2 years. The old stadium was serviceable, but it doesn't have all the amenities and space that the new stadium has. However, the old stadium really had charm, noise and character; the new stadium is anitseptic.

Hey wait, I'm not talking about the RCA Dome and Lucas Oil Field - I'm talking about the old Argosy Casino and the new Hollywood Casino!

The old Argosy - wow, I have a lot of memories from there. A temporary casino in Lawrenceburg opened in 1996, I believe. When I was working for TASC, a bunch of us from Dayton amde a road trip down there. I was still playing blackjack 80% of the time - and was at a $5 table. I put $10 in the circle - big money! - and they were about to deal the cards when a co-worker of mine butted in and put 5 red chips of his in my circle.

"Hey! What the hell are you doing?" I blurted.
"What? I'm piggybacking"
"What does that mean? You're messing things up!!"

I got dealt and ace, then a king. Blackjack. I still was pissed at him.

Layup and I would go there at least once a year, blaring Annie Lennox from the radio as we drove down the lonely stretch of I-275 at 9 at night.
Don and I would secretly root for a rain out if we were playing in Kentucky so that we could sneak over to Lawrenceburg instead.
I successfully convinced Janice we should go for a Argosy run for my birthday in January, 2001....so we spent 3 hours at a smoky craps table......(while she was 8 months pregnant).
When I worked at Winton Hill, in the west side of Cincinnati, I actually snuck over there for "lunch" one day - left work at 11, got back around 1:30. Yes, I was by myself. Why do you ask?

And then, the intimacy, the magic, the memories are all gone. The Argosy was replaced in 2009 with the monstrosity that is the Hollywood Casino. It's huge, impersonal, and it frankly sucks. I don't win there. The atmosphere is terrible. The dealers are all new and horrid. I will purposely drive 20-30 minutes out of the way to gamble at one of the other casinos.

It's what is happening to all the NFL stadiums now (and, to an extent, all new stadiums). The character, intimacy, and feel is gone. Sports Guy hsa wrote about this - the home field advantage is less nowadays just because of the structure of the new stadiums - they don't give the advantage to the home team like they used to.

Anyway - the Browns going to Indy, and their new stadium, reminded me of Argosy for this reason...I know it's a tenuous link. Dad is actually going to the game on Sunday - I'll report what he says about the atmosphere.

On to the games: (and there's no way in hell I'm predicting anything about this Browns team)

Buf 24, Oak 17. I still am trying to figure out each of these teams.

Was 27, Az 17. My goodness, the Cardinals' secondary is horrid. Grossman and the Skins will light them up.

Bal 24, Ten 21. A classic letdown game for the Ravens.

Pit 28, Sea 10. The Seahawks are in the bottom 5 of the league. The Steelers should take their frustrations out on them.

NYJ 20, Jax 17. I refuse to believe the Jets are championship caliber.

NO 31, Chi 17. The Saints are a bit desperate - they won't go 0-2.

TB 23, Min 20. Another desperation game - this time for the Bucs.

GB 30, Car 24. I do believe that the Panthers will be able to move the ball on the Pack. They won't win, but maybe Cam is for real - at least until defensive coordinators figure him out.

Det 24, KC 14. Alarm bells! This one seems too easy.

Dal 23, SF 16. I have to thinkn that Garrett will get this team fired up after their loss on Monday. They can't afford to go 0-2 (and 2 games behind the Skins?!?!?)

NE 31, SD 27. An old fashioned shootout at Jack Murphy. Where is Charlie Jones and Todd Christensen when you need them?

Cin 20, Den 16. Not exactly a vote in the Bengals, but against the Broncos.

Mia 24, Hou 20. Another classic trap/letdown game for the Texans. They threw everything they had into week 1 vs. the Colts. A letdown is impossible to avoid.

Atl 27, Phi 24. Another desperation game - this time for Atlanta.

NYG 20, StL 13. These offenses are pretty putrid.

Best bets: 16 of them. Last week: 9-5-2 (based on the lines I listed).
Buf -3
Was -3
Bal/Ten over 38
Pit -14
Jax +8.5
NO -6.5
TB +2.5
Car +10
GB/Car over 45.5
Det -7.5
KC/Det under 44.5
Dal -3
Cin +3
Mia +3
Atl +2
Stl/NYG under 44

Off we go!

Here are F&J's week 1 SuperContest picks. Lord help us!
The entire field's picks can be found here.

TB -1.5
Min +8.5
Arz -7
NE -7
Den -3

NFL Week 1: Palace Station

Here we are again! The opening week of the NFL season. The preseason is interminable as the anticipation for the opening week begins. Next thing we know, it will be week 6 with 1/3 of the season already gone.

I love the idea of tying each week to a Casino that I have visited! So, for week 1, of course, we will review the first casino I gambled at – the wonderful Palace Station! Everyone remembers their first Vegas trip – the buildup is tremendous, the plane is full of energy, the shuttle bus ride from the airport contains 32 overweight middle-aged women hoping to hit it big at slots, and the bus driver reciting lame puns about “Lost Wages” (yes, that’s an indelible memory)….

… and the next thing you know, it’s day 2 of the trip and you are down $200. (which was a HUGE amount of money for me in 1994!)

That is very much like week 1 of the NFL season – everyone is giddy, even Chris Berman seems funny – and then your favorite team lays an egg. By Monday, you are wondering “what the hell happened to my team/picks/fantasy team?” The Monday/Tuesday after week 1 is usually such a letdown.

Let’s hope the afterglow of week 1 is better than the final day of my first Vegas trip – where I had to resort to playing BINGO at Palace Station (I think I won a pot worth $7.75) and I eventually got carded while playing the nickel slots.

Onward to the picks!

GB 23, NO 20 – yes, a cop out pick. I do believe the Saints will be better this year. We will see how the rookie Ingram does.

Bal 27, Pit 17 – I do believe in the power of desperation. If a team is desperate, they will throw everything out there in order to win that game. It’s hard to think of week 1 as desperation, but if the Ravens lose – at home – they will be 1 down to the Steelers and they still have to go to Pit. Sports Guy’s podcast threw this idea out, and it makes sense. I think the Ravens will do anything to win this game.

TB 26, Det 20 – I like Josh Freeman, and I don’t trust the Lions (do they have a RB?) yet.

Atl 23, Chi 20 – who knows. I’m afraid of the Falcons outdoors. Cutler is good for some good games, and the Falcons don’t have a great defensive team.

KC 17, Buf 16 – Tyler Palko is in. Wow. Do they really deserve to be a heavy favorite here?

Hou 27, Ind 17 – I’m staying away from each of these until we find out more from each team.

Phi 20, StL 19 – The Eagles’ O-line sucks. I would be scared if you have Vick on your fantasy team.

Ten 27, Jax 17 – I’ve seen the Luke McCown show before – 5 years ago. I don’t think he has gotten much better from his days when I proclaimed for him to be the answer in Cleveland.

Was 27, NYG 24 – Grossman is starting, and the Giants have no secondary. This seems like a good opportunity for Grossman to have a nice start to the season before a real defense comes along.

Az 27, Car 13- - I just see the Panthers as clearly the worst team in football.

SF 20, Sea 16 – no idea here. Who’s starting for the Niners?

SD 24, Min 20 – look here now. Minnesota is not that bad. They have the best RB in football. McNabb is adequate – and he’s much better than what Favre game him last year. I think this will be a close game.

Dal 23, NYJ 17 - I think Sanchez is a mediocre quarterback – and look who the Dallas D coordinator is – Rob Ryan, our D coordinator last year. Rob developed game plans against Brady, Brees and Sanchez last year – and we went 2-0-1 against them. * I think Sanchez will look a little lost at times out there.

NE 30, Mia 16 – I just don’t see how NE is threatened in this game.

Den 30, Oak 20 – I like Kyle Orton. I think he’s at least an average quarterback. And I the coach is definitely an upgrade.

Best Bets of the week:
Bal -1
Pit/Bal over 36
TB -1.5
Buf +6
Buf/KC under 40
StL +4.5
Ten +2
Ten/Jax over 37
Was +3
Was/NYG over 37.5
Az -7
Min +8.5
Dal +4.5
NE -7
Den -3
Oak/Den over 40


*we beat the Pats and the Saints last year – and if we chose to, we could have tied the Jets. However, Mangini gambled for the win instead of settling for the sure tie (a decision I agreed with) , but lost. So I count this as a tie in my book.

Just spent the last four days in Vegas getting this set up, losing money at UTH, and doing a football fantasy draft. I have to say that drafting in Vegas was absolutely amazing.

1. 7 out of the 10 guys showed up. I greeted all of them with a $5 WNBA wager on Seattle Storm. What a huge hit! Thanks Eric for the idea. And to boot, the Storm covered and I am a legend now with the League.
2. Had to do the draft in our room. Worked out great. Got 7 CPK pizzas delivered up to the room, which lasted only about 15 minutes.
3. The commissioner (Brian) incorporated a great drinking idea into our draft. Each of us had to submit two names of players that would get drafted outside of the first three rounds. When they were drafted, the person who drafted said player had to do a shot. If the player was drafted by one of the three guys not in attendance, then you had to do the shot for him. Most of us picked kickers and defenses, so it really made the last three rounds awesome. Nothing like timidly selecting a kicker and then the commissioner announcing that you had to do 2 shots with the group going crazy.
4. After the draft, we were all pretty much trashed. Handing out 14 shots started to take its toll. I only gambled for another hour after the draft and then we all ended up going to a country bar over at the TI. Why? Because we saw that they were having specials on shots. Not a good idea. The last thing I remember was being pushed around in a cart in the TI casino before jumping off and all of us running out of the casino before being kicked out. I also ordered a double shot of lamb burgers. Yes, I ate 2 lamb burgers at BLT at 4 am in the morning before passing out at the table. Great time.

As for gambling, I took it on the chin. Lost a $600 hand at UTH on a kicker. And the UTH dealers now are acting all weird. Like you have to bet in order and no talking or sharing cards. Something must of happened for them to be that strict. The dealers do recognize me now which is nice, but probably not a good thing. I've been doing so bad at UTH that as a result of this latest outing, they comp'd two rooms for me during labor day weekend. Ugh. I can't wait for March though....

2011 NFL Season Preview

OK, everyone, it's time for the audience participation part of the blog! The 2011 NFL season is coming up soon - and yes, I am cautiously optimistic (as usual) about the Browns this year. I just watch the Direct TV "Short Cuts" of the 34-14 win over the Pats from last year - and I'm ready for the season to start.

A few notes:

1. I am planning to re-start the weekly NFL previews with my picks. I just need a topic to center the previews around. To recap, I started this preview theme in 2006 by listing one of my favorite "Price is Right" games each week. In 2007, it was Seinfeld characters; in 2008, it was summarizing the NFL Head referees, and in 2009, it was the 18 holes of Augusta. We didn't do the weekly previews last year for obvious reasons.

So - looking for input from the readers on possible topics for 2011. It would have to be a "top 17" list for each week of the season.
We could focus on pop culture (like: 17 top sitcoms of the 80s; the 17 shows I watched the most in college, 17 one-hit wonders)
It could focus on football (top 17 Browns victories since the return, top 17 Browns quarterbacks, etc.)
(Do the Browns actually have 17 victories since 1999? -ed) Ha ha
Or it could be completely arrogant and focus on me (top 17 golf rounds in my career, top 17 putts that put the dagger in my friends, etc.)

Any input is welcome.

2. I went back and actually looked at my record in doing these picks. Here is the recap; these picks and records are all on the blog for public review, with the exception of 2010. I put this statement here for complete disclosure, unlike a certain friend of Wiz's whose initials are D.M.
2006: 140-124-8 (53%)
2007: partial year: 84-101-10 (45%)
2008: 143-105-8 (58%)
2009: 104-120-4 (46%)
2010: 119-102-4 (54%)

For a grand total of: 590-552-34, or 51.7%. Hmmmmm...seems like 590-552 should sound better than 52%.

The pattern I am falling into - even numbered years are good, odd numbered years are bad - is not a good sign as we move into..........

3. Stepping it up: Layup and I have an announcement to make. We have decided to make fools of ourselves this year and see how we fare vs. real competition in the Las Vegas Hilton Supercontest. Basically, we pick 5 games against the spread each week - and after 17, the entries with the best records win. Simple as that. We are still working out all the details - I'm sure we will have a link so people can see the standings.

4. Am I a degenerate, or merely a fan? Do you really want an answer? -ed One of the ex-pats here in Guangzhou is also a Browns fan. This is his first NFL season here - and he bought the "NFL Rewind" package from NFL.com that plays the shortened versions of each game over the internet, on demand. The games will be available for download at midnight each night Eastern time.

He invited a bunch of us - including me - to come over every Monday night to his place and watch 1) the Browns game and 2) other games after that. It's clear that the Browns are the main attraction....

....but I told him I probably would decline. You see, he requested that no one log into the internet or check scores all day Monday - so that we see the games for the first time on Monday night. That makes sense - and many people can do that - but I can't. There's just no way that:
1) I can sleep when the NFL is on and I have a slingbox, and
2) I can go a whole day without checking the scores on the internet/iPhone.

There's just no way I can see myself having that self-discipline. None. Am I weak, or just normal?

5. Home vs. Cincinnati....at Indy, maybe without Peyton.....home vs. Miami.....home vs. Tennessee....at Oakland...home vs. Seattle....at San Fran....at Houston....home vs. St Louis....home vs. Jacksonville....at Cincinnati.....

Yep, that's our first 11 games....and that just sounds like 8-3, no?

Ah, the ex-pat life

Today, Janice took the boys to a real Chinese hair salon to get their hair cut. Last year, we went to the ex-pat compound where most of the Americans live - there is a hair salon in that complex. The boys got their hair cut for 38 RMB each.....and each cut was done in record time (under 6 minutes each). So it wasn't the highest quality.

Janice took the boys out on our street to one of the local hair salons - there are at least 10 of them between our apartment and the main bridge, a span of 2 km.

What occurred was pretty much what you would expect. The boys were pampered. Martin, especially, loved the attention - as you can see in the picture.

All for a price of 30 RMB ($4.75) each.

Two random pictures

1. I found my soulmate in Hong Kong! Here is a picture of the dashboard of our taxi in HK before we left. So - for all of you who made fun of me for my phone & pager obsessions, I have nothing on this guy.
(I wonder what each phone is for....)



2. There is a popular book out about Chinese society, called "Sleeping Chinese". It is a photo book filled with pictures of Chinese citizens sleeping in odd, public places. Here is the website.

Let me just say that it is 100% complete reality. I was walking on the sidewalk from our P&G office to our travel agent in another building....at 12:30 in the afternoon.

This is just one random picture during my walk that was repeated 15, 20 times. Everywhere you looked - people napping in public.

Civilized Dining in Guangzhou

1. A sign of civilization here in Guangzhou! The first Burger King in the city opened in May - and we finally got around to going to it yesterday. (It's located in a mall).

The whoppers were very similar to the ones in the US; the onion rings were a bit underdone and dry. But still - can't complain!

2. Here is part of a drink menu from a restuarant we went to Friday night. Has anyone every heard of this drink? Somehow, I don't think Sprite has entered Kermit's body since 1994.

Don't get to work late

I got into the office late one day - about 8:45, 8:50 or so. After getting my 600mL bottle of Pepsi at the Circle K (cost: 3.50 yuan, or about 60 cents) I headed to the elevators.

Apparently, the subway just arrived and there were a horde of people at the elevators. Here is a picture of the line I was in - the elevator I wanted was directly to the right.

The line of people in back is for the far elevators - the elevators are by the blurry TV screen. There were at least 50 people in line.

As you can see, they set up the airplane-gate ropes by the elevator to maintain a constant queue going to the separate elevators.

The lesson, of course - everyone in the 40 story office building arrives between 8:45 and 9:30. Don't arrive at those times.

A picture to make an Irishman cry

Had to put this picture up for Craig. This is a picture from a supermarket that features many foreign foods. For import foods, the flag of the nation is there to show where it was imported from.

Here's a picture of the beer aisle. You can see - Beck's imported from Germany, Heineken from Holland, and a mystery beer in the top left, imported from Malaysia....

A glowing review

There is a small waterpark nearby our apartment. A friend of ours went on Sunday with his kids - I asked for a review, and whether we should take our boys sometime.

His response, verbatim:

Fun, but go early, as the filters have a hard time keeping up with population. Water very clean at beginning, by noon a little cloudy. Plus, more public urination than I prefer at my water parks.

Otherwise, lovely!

The definition of demotivation

Yesterday, the gym at our complex was closed - no reason given, just a notice that "on August 14th, the facitilies will be temporarily closed". I really needed to get some exercise, as I have skipped a couple of sessions last week - so I decided to run outside yesterday afternoon.

It wasn't deathly hot - even though it was 90-95 degrees and 90% humidity - the run was on the river and there was some shade, at least. I completed 5K in about 30 minutes (29:45!!!) and walked back into the apartment complex.

I was dripping with sweat and still trying to catch my breath fully when I went into the elevator with a middle-aged Chinese woman. After saying "Ni Hao", she responded with something like:

"Pao Lao Ti"

I had no idea what she was saying, so she tried again, a bit slower:

"Pao Lao Tai" - different word on the end.

"Pao Lao Tai", she tried one more time.

I shrugged - again - and got to my floor and exited.

5 seconds later - it hit me. Hey- maybe I know some of those words! "Tai", I remember, is "too" - like too hot, too much, too cold, etc.

"Lao" - where I have heard that before? "Lao Shi" is the word for teacher....literally meaning "old leader". So "Lao" must be old, or elderly....

Hey, wait a minute...I don't like where this is going.

I looked up "Pao" on my IPhone Chinese dictionary - yup, one of the definitions for Pao means "to run"

So - she literally told me "run old too", or, with some simple rearranging, "too old to run" - I'm too old to run.

I'm going to have to learn Chinese in order to respond to insults within an hour.....

(* "Lao Ti" I think is worse; it means "old and weak". So she could be saying "I run like an old, weak man".)

Only the best

Here is a picture of our engineering department shirts that were ordered for an offsite.

I think the owner of the company who makes the shirt needs to take the advanced

English lessons.....

Chinese Logic

We have been doing a lot of miscellaneous stuff around the apartment here to get ready for another year here in China. It's very hard to believe that the 1 year anniversary for our assignment was on Saturday; it's even harder to believe that the boys go back to school on Wednesday!

The feeling around here reminds me of the first hours of a Vegas trip on Wednesday. Our friends are arriving bit by bit - we all know that they have to be here by Wednesday, but I'm not sure of their exact arrival dates. One friendof ours came back last Thursday; another arrived this weekend; twomore are coming tomorrow (I think).....it's very much like a Wednesday night in Vegas, when the whole group starts arriving in stages.

The big addition to the apartment this year is a new router we bought in California; it workslike a charm and I can access the signal all the way in the kitchen. Slingbox now works on the main TV - so I may be camped out on our couch for the NFL games on Monday morning from 1-4 am.

We also went to the sporting goods store to buy a bike for Martin. As you can see in the first picture - you will be satisfied or....you will be satisfied! There is no other choice!

The mindset of customers in stores here is much different. The second picture is a picture of the ping-pong table displays in the store. As you can see, customers have no problem in helping themselves in trying the equipment/table out. The bike area in this store is filled with customers actually riding sample bikes up and down the aisle.

And it's like this in every store. You should see the IKEA on a Saturday ( I did yesterday). It's like a hospital waiting room. 90% of the seats of the sofas/chairs on display are occupied. At least half of the beds on display has someone laying on it. Hey, it's there to be used, right?

The landlord's assistant came over on Saturday as we shared a list of things we wanted done around the place to renew our lease. One of the items was the swimming pool at the apartment. The pool is open from 8:30 - 11, and then from 3:30 - 9. It is closed from 11-3:30.

Those hours are fine during the week, but during the weekend, with 3 kids? I mean, early afternoon hours are prime hours to be at the pool!!! So I brought this up with the manager.

"Yes, it is closed from 11 - 3:30."

Well, can it be open during those hours on a weekend?

"Oh....hmmmm...well, those are the hours when the sun shines on the pool."

And?

"It gets hot on the pool deck - with the sun there. It's too hot to work. So we close it down until it gets colder at 3:30."

So - you actaully close the pool because it is too hot to swim?

"Yes, that's right."

Let me get you the number of a pool manager in Las Vegas and you can talk to them on how to keep a pool open during the summer.....

Am I getting soft?

Layup and I made a trip to the Pala Casino in Southern California the night before I left. We ended up spending 4 1/2 hours out there - we thought we would play some UTH, some Pai Gow, blackjack - you know, some variety.

As you probably guessed, 100% of the time was spent on UTH.

And not just normal UTH - this was Progressive! For an extra $1 (or more, I guess) on top of the trips, you have a side bet on the hand you form with your two hole cards and the three flop cards. A royal wins $75,000!

(Of course, no one came close).

Anyway, Layup and I settled in nicely - to his left, Layup made friends with a 60 year old Asian woman who knew no English but would engage Layup in a high-ten (two hands) when they both hit a winning hand. Stevie Williams and Tiger had better coordination.

Next to me was a 50-something woman who seemed to be Mexican by birth but was Americanized. Her and I would chat a bit about the hands - very friendly. Every once in a while, this strange male, about 25-30, who had some sort of mental defect would come over and hover; the lady would quickly scold him in Spanish, telling him to sit down over there and shut up. (Sientese alli! See, I still know some spanish.

After the third visit by this man, I gave my neighbor a quizzical look.

"That's my son. He fell into a pool when he was young, drowned and had some brain damage because of it."

Oh - sorry to hear that.

"Yes, he likes to come with me and hang out while I play. He's going in for surgery tomorrow - he's getting a skin graft - and he can't have anything to eat after midnight. So I have to keep an eye on him."

Um - ok. I will file that away in my brain - if any of you think I have a gambling problem (you know, taking my 7 month pregnant wife to play craps in a smoky Argosy casino, betting halftime lines for WNBA, driving 10 hours in one day to gamble)- I'll just throw this lady out as the counter example. I'm not as bad as her!

Anyway, about 2 hours in, I was winning some and Layup was up some too. Two ladies came over and occupied the seats at the far end of the table. One was a 60-year old country girl, dressed in a cowboy shirt that was adorned with rhinestones. I immediately thought "Ann Richards", but Layup beat me to it and whispered "Rhinestone Cowboy is here".

Two hands in - two hands! - she noticed that Layup and I were not playing the trips. Here we go again.

"You're not playing the trips? That's stupid. That's how you make money in this game! You have to play the trips!"

Before I could say anything, Layup pulls the "Shufflemaster" card out and says he works for Shufflemaster and said the Trips bet "is for suckers only". That shut everyone up for a while.

The mood of the table turned icy - but a strange thing happened. I started winning. And - oddly - I was the only one winning. Layup went on a losing streak; our friends started losing, and Rhinestone kept losing too. But I kept winning. I would guess that 40-50% of my hands were A-x, K-6 or higher or Q-J - --- all hands to go in 4x before the flop. I didn't win all of them, but I did win about 75% of them - that helps the bankroll.

Rhinestone started paying attention, and then was interested in our methods.
"You go 4x on any ace?"

Oh dear, I can see this coming a mile away. Yes, I replied.

"Hmmmmph...."

The next hand - the next one, I swear! - she got dealt an ace. She went 4x. She lost.

Three hands later, she got A-x again. She did not go 4x, she waited until the last round, went 1x - and won.

By then, the mood of the table was in the pits. No one was winning. Layup, who was up a few hundred, was now down to his last few bets. Our friends left.

But I kept on winning.

I felt sympathtic to the table - and even toward Rhinestone. Five years ago - one year ago? - I would have muttered "f*** her" to Layup. But no - she's just a mistaken woman who can't be bothered to understand the odds. I felt some pity for her.

And it depressed me that no one else was winning. The best times at a casino are when everyone wins. This was an odd feeling - I'm winning but no one else can buy a hand.

We played another hour - the mood did not improve, and Layup fought back to even - but I never felt vengeful, or overjoyed at the table. I won 4 digits of profit - and yet I just wish Rhinestone would have shut her mouth and hept her head down when she sat at the table.

What's wrong with me? I am getting soft and emotional as I get older, aren't I?

Chinese Young Love

In the Starbucks near work (actaully, on the 1st floor of our building), there is a notebook where aspiring young artists/poets/party memebers can write down their deepest thoughts & notes. I was flipping through it yesterday while waiting for my drink....and came across this.

Is this sarcastic? Quixote-ish? Encouraging? Who knows.....I will have to find Jason somehow....

Jet Lag

It's been a week now since we've been in China - and I think it's safe to say now that we are over the jet lag. It only took us 7 days!

(there is some sort of scientific study that it takes you one day to recover from jet lag for each time zone you travel. That may be true for 80-year olds, but cmon....3 days to recover from a visit to/from CA?)

We landed early Wednesday morning last week - after a 14 hour flight. Everyone took some sort of nap that day. At 6:30 pm, the boys were crying that they wanted to go to bed. They went to bed at 7 pm.

The whole house was up Thursday morning at 2:30 am.

On Friday, everyone was up at 4; on Saturday, it was 5. For 5 days, everyone was in bed sleeping at 10 pm - including us.

On Sunday, I tried to stay up to 10:30 pm at night, only to wake up at 4:30. On the bright side, I was able to watch the end of the golf and see my golfer, Gary Woodland, woefully underclub on 18 when he needed a birdie.

Only today are the boys finally waking up at the regular hour (7 am).

It's much, much tougher coming here than going from here to the US.

Golf Notes for the future

Had a chance to play 6 rounds of golf while in the US. As most of you know, I have been struggling off the tee with the driver; the solid slight draw that I learned in 2003 and played until about 2007 is now gone, replaced by a hard pull-hook (lovingly called a spatula by Steve). Over the last 3 years, I really have had no good idea where the ball is going off the tee; I have been trying to hit a hard fade as the go-to shot.

That worked for a while. I hit it for the first round at Yankee, when I shot 79 (44-35, including a 40 yard chip in on the last). However, that fade went away the next day with Don and Mike in a disastorous round.

The next week I played with Steve and Kermit, and the power fade was working for about 7 holes; I was +2 and really should have been even. Then I hit an awful block-slice on 8, and that was it for me off the tee. The afternoon round at Granville was horrid - I can't recall any drive that hit the fairway in that round.

The next day I played with Janice's cousin at NorthStar, a new semi-private John Cook design just north of Columbus. Same thing - power fade works for 6-8 holes, then disappears. On the back side, after missing a 40-yard-wide fairway for the 4th hole in a row, I said "f it" and tried to hit the draw again.

It worked. Two tight draws to end the round, and they were the longest drives I've hit in 6 months. Right before i left, I snuck out to play Crooked Tree at 6 in the morning; I tried the same swing off the tee and put it out of play just once. That, unfortunately, is a vast improvement.

But something clicked. It felt right. Yes, this is the swing that worked in the mid-2000s. This is it. So, even though no one cares, here are the keys to the "magic" swing I found for the last 20 holes. I need to read this before each infrequent round of golf....

1. Line up square! Don't overcompensate by closing or opening the stance.
2. Line up to the right edge of the fairway
3. Normal backswing - don't exaggerate by taking it too far in or out.
4. Compact backswing - the complete opposite of Kermit's backswing.
5. On the downswing, pivot around left leg.
6. Swing out! Don't steer by "pulling" the clubhead. Swing out and trust it!

In fact, this song played in my head all through Iowa in 2004-05 to remind me of the in-to-out swing path. I regret I never had a chance to sing it to anyone this summer.

I'm the one you hurt
And I'm the one you need
I'm the one who cried
the one you used to meet

But you are pretendng you don't care
But the fire is still there!
Now we are much too young to love each other this way

I'll leave it to the commenters to name the title of this tune.

Back up and running

Hello again! We are back in China after a 4-week trip to the US. I first want to thank everyone for a great time during the last four weeks. Thanks to all for making the time to see us during the compressed schedule!

Once I got back, a lot of people here asked how my "vacation" was. Well, to be honest, only the last 4 days in California actually felt like a vacation! The three weeks in Cincinnati were a whirlwind - both Janice and Itried to work half the time and then take off the other half.....and that plan was a mixed success. It seems like we didn't have enough time for either. There may be some changes for next year's visit.

(Also, so many people told me when I got back here... "you look relaxed!" What do I normally look like? As uptight as Brad Childress?

What did I miss the most about the US? I think the freedom.....the freedom to go anywhere, drive anywhere. If I got up at 6:30 and wanted an Almond Joy Latte from the local coffee shop, I can get in the car and do that. Martin got a fever one night - so I hopped in the car at 11 pm and went to Kroger's. That just can't happen here, due to the fact that I can't drive and most stores aren't open at those hours.

The boys didn't miss a beat - we landed at 10 am on a Monday and asked if thye could play with their friends in the neighborhood that afternoon. And it truly felt- for them - like nothing had changed; they went right to their Wii games or legos, just like they did in summer of 2010.

However, China truly feels like home now. By the 4th week, we were looking forward to coming "home" to China. Even Freddie made that comment. That was unexpected.

Once we arrvied here, we were quickly reminded of the life in China in the summer; the smells and odors are very pungent in July. Just imagine a trash can sitting full on a city street in 95 degree heat 24 hours day - by day 3, it's fairly "ripe". Those are the smells we are greeted with as we walked to the store yesterday.

Oh - that and the cockroach found in our baby wipes drawer in the laundry room.

Many of you mentioned that you'd love to see more blogging - so I will try to create most posts for this coming year. We bought a laptop, so that should help a lot - I am currently blogging while eating Trix and ddrinking coffee at our dining room table. I'll make an effort to post more photos/comments in the future.

Welcome Home!

Well - we are back! We are here in the US for about 4 weeks for our annual return home. For me, it's about 50% work and 50% vacation - which means running around for doctor's appointments, clothes shopping, and to see everyone.

Some initial impressions about being back:

- it's cool in the morning! I never appreciated summer mornings when you wake up and it is 65 degrees. In Guangzhou, we haven't seen that temperature since April. It's amazing how refreshing that feels.
- the sun! Ow! My eyes! Constant sunlight! It's so bright!
- You can see the horizon - the sunsets - the morning sky. It's been clear here for the few days we've been back - and I never realized how much I've taken the "clear" sky for granted. You can see for miles! That's just not the case in Guangzhou. And Cincinnati isn't exactly what you call a "clean" sky - Iowa is 10x better - but the difference is remarkable.
- Martin has some eczema on his skin - that magically is clearing up nicely after just four days here in the US! Hmmmmmmm...
- My stomach is on overload. We got breakfast on Monday in the Detroit airport; I quickly ordered the "Sausage and Cheese sandwich on a Maple Biscuit". What genius invented this sandwich? Wow - heavenly. It's been nothing but bad food since then. And my stomach isn't processing it too well.....

T-shirts

Something random for a Saturday: T-shirts.

Most of the T-Shirts that native Chinese are wearing have words in English.As you can imagine, the English on the shirts are mangled...

...but even on those where the English is not mangled, the T-shirts makes no sense.

I should keep a running list of confusing/hilarious/odd shirts that I have seen; the three that I saw over the past week:

"World Wide Wet" (with drops of water coming from the words)

"My Green in Greener than your Life" (the T-shirt had a camoflauge design)

and:

"Who the F*** is Mick Jagger? (yes, the word was spelled correctly on the shirt)

I just wonder who makes these shirt designs. Fascinating.

US Open thoughts

Hi all....I know it's been a while since there's been a posting here - we've had computer problems (a week of the blue screen on startup), and life has been extremely busy.

But it is Open week! It's going to be weird to get home from work tomorrow, eat dinner, play with the kids, put them in bed.....and then go to the Slingbox and turn on ESPN to start watching the Open.

I'm truly excited for the tournament. It's wide open - and that's good. It should set up for a crowded finish, with 8-10 people within 2 shots of the lead. Everyone in the top 10 right now has flaws.....

(which means Ben Curtis will be your winner? Hey,he's got a good track record at Avenel.....)

Some quick takes on the tournament matchups on VIP: here's who I like (ok, here's who I love:)

Westwood -105 over Donald
Kaymer -115 over D Johnson
F Molinari -115 over Quiros
Glover -125 over Els
Poulter -105 over Snedeker
Vegas -115 over Fisher
Manassero -110 over Casey
Day +105 over Toms

8-way Parlay action!

Why?

Why have I heard "Auld Lang Syne" on the elevator twice in the past week? And why did I hear "Have a Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives at Starbucks on Saturday?

Why is there a small trash can in every public restroom stall? *

Why - since everyone here lives in an apartment building with elevators - does no one here have any common courtesy? Why are these sort of things commonplace:

- anytime the door opens, people think it is their turn to get on - or off- the elevator. It's a mass traffic jam at the ground floor when all the people are trying to get off when the doors open - and the people coming in don't wait and try to get on at the same instant.

- at least once per day I get on the elevator and go up; the elevator stops at a few floors and then some lady giggles; she pushes the button of a floor we already past. It never fails. People don't realize they past their floor. Why?

- at least one per week, I get to the elevator, and I see a person standing next to the elevators, apparently waiting......but the "up" or "down" button is not pushed. I push "up"; it comes, and the person gets in with me and we go up.
Um - do you think it magically knows you are there? You do have to push the button, you know....


And speaking of elevators,
Why is this KFC commercial constantly playing in our office elevator? Do people actually buy this?
(No, I have not tried it - yes, I want to. I will file a full report once I order it).
(thanks to Keith for the link to the commercial)


* - I actually know this answer....I just would like some of you to guess why.

Sports Blogging, part 2

Time for a bowling outing!

A few weeks ago, 5 families got together for a bowling outing at the local lanes - new lanes at the Asia Games sports center.

(Do you sense a theme here? A lot of the "infrastructure" improvements in the city were all sprruedon by the city hosting the Asia games last fall. That's why many veteran ex-pats here just shake their heads at all the changes they have seen in this city in the past 5 years. It really has become a modern city.)

It's a very modern facility a 32-lane center with (of course) automated scoring and bumpers, if needed. They had shoes my size (size 11!) and the lanes were extremely well lit. The flags of the participating countries were still hanging from the ceiling.

The ball racks were all labeled; you would see a "9" on a rack, and that means that's where the 9 lb balls go there. I thought that was ingenious. No more wasting 10 minutes at the beginning trying to find a proper ball.

However, the downside: there were racks and racks of 8, 10, 11, 12 lb balls; in the whole 32 lane facility, there were 6 15-lb balls and 3 16-lb balls. That's it. It's like the complete opposite of the US, where there is one 8 lb ball for the kids and 3,562 16 lb balls for Vito and his pals.

(The adults did get to bowl one game; my 138 was not that awful, considering it's been 18 months since I bowled and the presence of 2 Chinese kids crawling all over the ball return system while I bowled. It's not a jungle gym.....)

Sports blogging, part 1

So if I told you that the boys are in Little League here in China, what would you think? How do you picture a little league field? When I heard that ex-pats were trying to put together a Little League this spring, I thought we would be playing on a converted soccer field, on a lot of dirt/hardpan, with possibly some rebar/nails sticking out of the ground.

I couldn't be more wrong.

Here is a video of the field that the boys play at. The league has rented out the Asia Games baseball stadium every Saturday in the spring (for a fee of 500 RMB/$90 weekly).

I am standing in centerfield; you can see games going on in the left field corner and the right field corner. (Freddie's team is practicing in cetner field; and yes, I throw up a little when I have to wear a red jersey with the words "SOX" on it.)

The fields are immaculate. The grass is always cut, it is perfectly flat (no bad bounces), and we get the use of the locker room (and even the stands, to keep toddlers occupied).

The field is located in the heart of the city- the surroundings are spectacular. The large building right behind us in center field is the Citic building, the 15th largest building in the world. You can also see the Soccer stadium behind the right field line.

These kids have no idea how good they have it. It is 10,000% better than the field I grew up on - the field down the hill behind Sparks elementary that flooded every time we got 1/4" of rain, or the field for Freddie's 1st grade league that was hidden behind the Lakota school bus depot......

(as an aside, I never really knew how hard it is to "teach" baseball until now. Let's say you have a bunch of kids that know nothing about sports. Nothing. They are a blank slate. What's easiest to teach?

1. Soccer - kick the ball in the net, don't use your hands.
2. Basketball - put the ball in the hoop, try to dribble every once in a while, don't hold on defense.
3. Baseball. I don't think we Americans realize how many basic rules there are that has to be taught before even having a semi-competitive game. The rules on force plays alone confuse the non-American kids (and the adults). Why can I overrun first base but not 2nd? What happens on a fly ball that's caught?

Heading Back to Vegas

So in two weeks Carol and I will be heading out to Vegas for her birthday. Her friend, Lauren, will be watching Morgan leaving us 3 days to ourselves. This will be very interesting since my gambling habits have changed dramatically since the last time we gambled together. Let's see what has changed since my last trip:

1. Craps- I can't half ass it anymore. There is a saying in poker, if you get nervous making a bet, then you are playing beyond your means. Well a $25 table doesn't scare me anymore and a $12 wager is boring. There's good and bad things about that. One thing I liked about our trip in March was how easy it was to saddle up to one of those tables and cash in for the correct amount and not just a couple of hundred, hoping the table doesn't go cold. Back in March, craps really went well for me. I played the most I've ever played and did very well. When our group either broke even or was down, I seemed to be up. So I'm set on playing the come from now on. The only problem is can I control the hard ways.

2. UTH- Carol loves this game and when we both played it in Nov 2009, the swings were almost too much for me. Having to bankroll two hands at a $15 table, it can get ugly so quickly.

3. I will take Carol into the Lounge and we will see what her reaction will be. Once again, if she wants to play, then the budget is going to get crazy. Now Carol loves blackjack and I'm not too sure if I can stomach playing at a $10 table with all the riff raff anymore. I've become so pretentious haven't I?

4. Roulette- I only played for 15 minutes back in March waiting for Wiz to cash in his chips and I ended up walking away from the table because the dealer was a jackass. I love the tables at the Mirage and will hopefully be able to spend some time there this trip.

So I never posted anything about this last trip, which now I'm sad that I didn't. Too much work and too much baby time. I rate this trip very high in my book. Its up there with the time we first were introduced to Don and Mike. The UTH dealers were great, the dinners were very good, played golf on an amazing course, and almost came back as a winner. Below are some additional highlights:
1. I was all but done come Saturday. I was down to my last $500 and put all of it on games that day. My friend Brian came out from San Diego and we ended up going to the Mirage wine bar to watch some of the games. I had to pay for dinner that night so I had some funds for gambling. Then I went on an amazing run. Kicked ass at the Palazzo craps table, another great run at the Mirage craps table, and finally did very well at the UTH table. Ventured into the Lounge and did OK at the BJ table. Oh, and I went undefeated on my sports wagering. I was able to get back within $1000 of my original budget.
2. Got a text from Jay on Thursday morning asking how everything was going, and I responded that I "had to pump sea water into reactor one last night. reactor two is showing signs of overheating. Not a good start." That was my worst Wed/Thurs/Fri combo ever. It was horrific.
3. I know that its not fair, but I hold Eric to a different standard than others. When I found out that he bet the don't, I was devastated. When I saw him not being honest and take money from a dealer, I was appalled. And when he told me that he had a previous wager on FSU and he picked the other way in our parlay, I was shocked. SHOCKED!!!!! This is the crap I expect out of Wiz and Lee, not Eric. I'm writing my gamblers manifesto to give to Morgan and my nephews, and all three of these offenses will be in there on what not to do in a casino.
4. Speaking of the book, I have 6 chapters so far; Group Selection, Casino and Restaurant Selection, Room Behavior, Money Management, Gooching, and How to build positive Karma.

The news story that will never end

I suppose that many of us have things in the back of our brains that are there for unknown reasons. I seem to have vivid memories of certain events that occur around personal life-changing moments - for instance, I can tell you that OutKast's "Hey Ya!" was played 24 times on Sirius Channel 1 when we drove from Cincinnati to Iowa in January 2004 during our move.

One of these odd memories involved news reports in August, 1989, when my parents, Layup and I went to Cleveland as I started my freshamn year at Case. We stayed in a hotel for the first few days before I moved into the dorm; I distinctly remember reports of a "John Demjanjuk" taking over the lead story of the Channel 8 newscast.

(Ah, Wilma Smith....)

I still can't figure out why, but Demjanjuk was all over the news during that week. As most of you know, he lived in Cleveland then - in the neighborhood of Seven Hills, southeast of the city. It was fascinating to realize that an alleged Nazi war criminal was living literally down the street from the hotel you were staying at! *

Now, fast forward 22 years later to May, 2011....and he is still in the news. How is this still going on? Can't the wheels of international justice turn any faster? The latest update is that he has been convicted, but is released to a nursing home because of his health. Appeals are pending.

Can't we just end this chapter of history? I have no idea whether he is guiilty of war crimes or not - but you would hope that after 22 years (or even more!), a decision would be made on his guilt or innocence.

What is wrong with our system(s) to have the prosecution of Demjanjuk still going on? It's 2011......


* - for those of you familiar with Cleveland geography, you may wonder why our family would be staying at a hotel in Independence/Seven Hills when Case is in downtown Cleveland, 20 miles away. I think it has to do with "Marriott" points - some questions are best left unanswered.

Summer has started

A weather update: the weather has certainly turned over the past 3 weeks here, and now it is starting to feel like summer. Since the end of April, the temperatures have been in the mid to high 80s for a high with humidity always near 80%. And in most days, the sun is never our. If the sun pops out - that's when it feels really bad.

The worst part about it is the humidity. Once you start sweating, you can't stop - and there's nothing you can do about it. This is my t-shirt after a 20 minute jog on the treadmill. And no, this amount of sweat is not because I am out of shape. You just can't stop sweating because of the humidity.

As you probably would guess, this is certainly not the hottest it will be; the true summers in July and August will be the same humidity, but 10-15 degress warmer. Just great.

We've already had some mornings that felt like a unbearable muggy day in Cincinnati.

But it doesn't affect the natives, however. Our pool here opened up on May 1 - a cloudy day of about 82 degrees and 70-80% humidity (it would storm that night). We went down to the pool on opening day; and we were the only ones. A crowd of 4-5 workers came out at various times to watch the white family play in the "cold" (for them) pool. I seriously think they need it to be much warmer before they will take a dip in the outdoor pool.

Hong Kong trip report

So I am very late to post some random comments about our April trip to Hong Kong. Here is a picture from the Ocean Park amusement park/aquarium; the park is split into two sections, separated by a large hill. You have to take a sky cable car to go from one side to the other. The views are spectacular.

1. It is very disorienting and difficult to walk in the city. The sidewalks are fine; the problem is crossing the street. I have 39 years of experience in crossing street, so it is obviously second nature to look a certain way when crossing an intersection.

But, of course, in Hong Kong, drivers drive on the left hand side.

You really have to stop yourself and think - where are the cars coming from? For example - if you are on the southwest corner of an intersection and want to walk to the northwest corner, you automatically look to your left for oncoming cars. It's empty - you start walking - and a car comes zooming by you on your right, making a left hand turn in front of you. It's hard to override all your instincts.

2. We went to a beach one afternoon on the ocean. While we were there, a few Caucasian families with children were there. One of them starting playing ball with Freddie.

I asked him where he lived. As soon as I asked, I realized that was a dumb question - he could have said anything - a road, a city, a country. He responded by saying the name of some apartment complex near by.

The next automatic question to any Caucasian over here is "how long have you lived here?" I was about to ask the boy that, but then stopped. It is certainly possible - probable? - that this is not a temporary stop, but his permanent home. He could be a "citizen".... For whatever reason, that boggled my mind. For the past 9 months, any "white" person I see is automatically a foreigner and could live anywhere in the world...here I am in "China" and I see a white person - it does not even dawn on me that this person could be a native - and that his parents could have been living here for their whole life.

3. Hong Kong is full of culinary delights! We had dinner by the pool one night - I got a club sandwich with fries. Out came my order - the fries were perfectly done - with a side of Grey Poupon.

Now that's something I have missed. My mouth is still watering thinking about Grey Poupon and how great it went with those fries......

bin Laden notes

Thanks to Layup for alerting me last Monday of the breaking news that OBL was captured and killed. I really don't know when I would have found out about it if he did not text me at 11 in the morning. It's about damn time - congrats to the SEALs, all in the military, and Obama and his staff for making this happen.

Now, some whimiscal thoughts on the operation:

1. They had to have put a GPS tracker on the body bag, right? So someone has got to know the exact location of the body in the Indian (?) Ocean....
2. It's weird what your mind forms from words and reports. As the details started to filter in about how operation took place, the location that OBL was in was described as a "mansion", "fortress", "a house with impenetrable walls". I was detecting some huge structure, maybe a moat involved....
....and then you see the pictures of the compound. It was not at all what I pictured.
3. By now, everyone has seen the famous picture of Obama and his staff gathered around the TV that Sunday evening to watch the operation. My quick thoughts:

a. Obama - intense and focused, as you would expect (like his job depended on it??). However - I read a comment somewhere that I 100% agree with. Who gave him the lawn chair and made him sit in the corner? Why didn't he kick the general out of the command chair that was right next to him?
b. Hillary - I know that look. She's got the same look on her face that I do when the Browns are winning a close one in the 4th quarter. "Can they hang on? Can they do this? I know they are going to blow this. I can't watch."
c. Biden - Doesn't it just look like they had to pull him away from "Angry Birds" on his laptop to pay attention?
"Joe - the SEALs have now landed in the compound!"
"Fine, fine, fine..let me save the game......"
d. Who is the Roberto de Vincenzo look alike that is still wearing the coat and tie, without a button undone, during this high-stress situation? That's a person who clearly voted "no" on casual Fridays at the White House.

The Tribe!

OK, time to start blogging again. Life has been pretty crazy over the last few weeks - and the backlog of blog topics keep piling up.

How about the Tribe! With their good start, I saw this stat from ESPN. If this doesn't give you a nostaglic smile, then.....well, you must be a Red Sox fan....

With Tomlin at 4-0 and Justin Masterson at 5-0, the Indians have two pitchers with at least 4-0 records since Greg Swindell and Tom Candiotti did it in 1988.

Candiotti and Swindell....ah, the good old days.

(It is pretty amazing - every once in a while, I see a Chinese citizen wearing a Tribe hat. This photo was snapped in Beijing (he has this look on his face like "why are you taking my picture?)

This weekend, while walking to the store, I passed a woman in a tan and black striped dress......with a Chief Wahoo logo on it. I didn't get to my iPhone camera in time. They say China is now more technologically advanced than the US...maybe they know that the Tribe will be very popular in October and November this year.....

Posted without comment

Coming back from our trip to Beijing, we got a nice jolt back to Chinese culture and politics. We got a call that evening from the "boss" of our nannies...she said that the nanny will not be there in the morning; she is requiring surgery and will be out for a while.

Oh no, I said! I hope everything is ok!

She said she will be fine, and she will come back in 5 days.

OK.....wow. Surgery. Sounds serious. I hope nothing really awful happened.

The next day, her sister came and filled in for her shift. I asked if she is ok, is she hurt, is everything ok?

"No, everything fine. She be back on Monday."

What happened?

"Just operation to take baby away"

Ah....I see......

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter to all! It's hard to set up an Easter Egg hunt in an apartment complex, so we went downstairs to one of the common areas to hide eggs. In this pciture, there are 40 eggs.... boy, did I get some strange looks from the Chinese residents when I was hiding the eggs....

Just off the screen to the left, there is a door to the Children's playroom; I put two eggs right at the base of the door for Martin to find. Just as we started the Easter Egg Hunt, a cleaning lady arrive to clean that room.

After 10 seconds of the Easter Egg Hunt, the egg tally was:

Freddie 0
Warren 0
Martin 0
Cleaning Lady 2

The hunt was suspended for 30 seconds as I tried to convince the lady that the eggs were not trash and she needs to put them down.

Today we are having an Easter BBQ over another ex-pat's place; they were planning it last weekend at a dinner, and one of the quotes from the host was:

"What goes better with Easter than shots of Malibu?"

I think I will like this party tonight!

Beijing Zoo

Wehn someone goes to Beijing, there are two types of pcitures that the tourists are expected to share with their friends:

1. A picture of the Great wall; and
2. A picture of a Panda.

The Great Wall pictures turned out well; I don't think this pictures does justice to the elevation changes in the walkway. It truly is an amazing engineering feat.

(and to think that our tour guide said that "it is estimated that 1,000 people died for every mile of construction of the Great Wall". Now, the wall is 4000 miles long.......)




And our picture of the panda? Well, this is what greeted us at the Zoo on a Sunday morning.

"74" is now a true adult

Yesterday was the 21st anniversary of "74" day....

(here is the blog post defining the significance of that day)

It's hard to believe this was 21 years ago. I celebrated with cream soda and.....we had no rum, so I had to mix it with Southern Comfort. Cream Soda and Southern Comfort tastes surprisingly good together.

I wonder if the Poison Ivy scars have finally disappeared from Steve's hands from that round.......

Paparazzi

Now here is the China that we have been warned about.

So this is our first day in Beijing - it's been a long day, as we have visited Tianemen Square and the Forbidden Palace. After lunch, we went to the Summer Garden, a huge plot of land about 3 km south of the Square where the emporers prayed and relaxed.

(There was an "abstinence garden", where the Emporer was required to spend 7 days in before going to the temples. No comment necessary.)

So, around 3 pm, we stopped to take a break. Janice gave Martin a sucker and he sat down in one area of the garden.

Immediately, 4 middle aged Chinese women came over and started taking pictures. 4 turned into 5...then 6...then 8 women surrounding Martin.

The picture here best captures it. You can see Martin on the left with his lollipop (right under Freddie's head) - and on the right is all the Paparazzi that surrounded him.

It was interesting ....for the first 2 minutes. It never stopped. We had to shoo them away after about 10 minutes. Forcibly.

Why Layup would not make it in Hong Kong

It is a well known secret that the Zahn brothers love McDonald's breakfast....specifically, the Sausage McMuffin with egg. Oh, those good old days at the Monte Carlo when they were $1 each...we would down 3 each in the morning on the way to the sports book...

Well, here we are in the Hong Kong train station, and there is a McDonald's there. Time for lunch. Here are some of the choices for the Extra Value meal:

8. Double Cheeseburger meal
9. Quarter Pounder meal
10. Sausage McMuffin with Egg meal

That's right - you can get a Sausage McMuffin all day at McDonald's in Hong Kong. If Layup moved there, I would say his weight would be +50 pounds after 6 months. He would not be able to resist....

Snack for the boys

Continuing the food theme, here is the latest snack to arrive at our conveinence store downstairs.....