Thursday, March 13
There is always one day of the trip that is the most memorable one, where the group picks this day as the day most representative of that years' trip. Most of the "signature" days come on a Friday or Saturday, such as the Golden Nugget day of 2007, the cabana day of 2008, the downtown day of 2012, etc. For whatever reason, Thursday turned out to be the signature day of the 2014 trip.
Up and at them around 8, 8:30 - and the first order of business was to obtain the annual gift to the group - the $10 Money Line bet on America's favorite hockey team! That was done around 9 as the early NCAA games started to tip off. Saw Todd and Ben with Ira in the book as they were watching the games; Todd proceeded (again) to introduce himself. I admire his ability to get hammered by halftime of the first ACC quarterfinal.
Back for the morning baccarat session with Ana, the Filipino; she kept giving me "5"s which is an average hand in baccarat; that resulted in a wash of a session. After breakfast - where everyone received various casino chips from New Zealand - we did a group run to the craps table. It was proven again that none of us could roll.
At about 11:30, we packed up and headed to our first golf round at Shadow Creek. Shadow is a course wholly owned by MGM for the use of the casino guests of their resorts. The day started out nicely with the two caddies coming up to the 5 of us and complimenting all of us - "usually, we get guys that can't hit the ball 100 yards". (Well, he hasn't seen my mid-round tee shot yet).
I was nervous as hell on the first tee. I had been working hard on the tee shot to be looser and more aggressive; there was water on the left (which is where I miss it if I overcook it) on the dogleg left opening hole. The range session was good - I stepped up to the first tee - picked out a spot on the right side of the fairway - prayed - and took the club back.
I finished through the ball and it took off on a line down the left side of the fairway, just missing a fairway bunker. Fairway hit, 270 yd tee hit. Holy shit.
The next shot was a full wedge that I put to 15 feet; I had an uphill putt to win the first hole for the team - but even though I missed it, I was so happy. Par on the first.
That was it for a while. The next tee shots were: 100 yards left (#2), 230 yd hook into the water (#3, #4), 80 yd worm burner into the weeds (#5), 100 yard pull (#6), ....
Well, so much for positive thinking.
On #14 or #15, I joked about what I did last year when I struggled - I threw the tee ball on the ground and teed off from the deck. Why don't I start here? It was a 470 yds par 4. I placed the ball on the turf - and whack - 240 down the middle. Par. Good drive on 16; 17 was a unbelievable par 3 which could resemble an elevated #12 at Augusta. I took at 8 iron - ball started right of the flag and drew in to the left-side pin position. Right on line.....
.... until it flew everything and into the back pond.
Oh well. Made a back-breaker 12 foot uphill putt for par on 18 to win money from Don and Wiz. Felt a bit better after hitting the last 3 fairways without a tee.
Two notes from the round:
- Someone was on fire on the front side, and it wasn't Wiz, Don, Mike or I. Leland came through with the career nine of 39 on the front at Shadow Creek. 2 birdies, was it? Great driving, excellent irons and no three putts. Awesome to see. I think he will retire from the game for 10 years after that round.
- Nothing worse than the battery dying on your phone when you are trying to track the Cincinnati/Central Florida under (largest over/under bet at 4 units) and America's favorite hockey team trying to protect a 3rd period, 1-goal lead. Mike and Leland were pissed at my constant requests for their phone on the last 3 holes.
The locker room was a shrine to current sports stars. There was the Michael Jordan locker. Mike Shanahan had a locker - which was the background for some pictures taken by the Skins fan in the group. And then we saw a large black man laid out on the couch, dressed in golf gear, watching the games. I thought nothing of it - until Wiz/Leland started to talk about him.
"You know who I think that was?". No.....
"That's Shannon Sharpe's brother! You know, the receiver?"
Sterling Sharpe? Yes, yes, that was him!
Sterling may have gained a few pounds since his playing days, but there he was, on the couch in the locker room. This concludes the 2014 version of "Celebrities we have seen gambling during our trip" (although there were reports of Montell Williams in the high-limit slot area this year).
We got back just in time to get ready for dinner, at Sage at the Aria. Hoo boy, what an adventure this was. Our reservation was at 7 - we got there in time, seated fine - and then it seemed that it took forever for the server to come over. And then the sommelier did not appear for a while. Our appetizers took a while to arrive.
The poor sommelier came over after the appetizers and Layup said very loudly and dryly "Well, thanks for showing up" or some such sarcastic remark. Ah, I see the alcohol was kicking in!
My choice for the entrée came down to the pork chops - which I do not get at ALL in China - or the flank steak. I asked the waitress - she recommended the pork. Wiz went with the pork also. Layup, Don and Mike all chose the steak.
The food came - well, let's just say there were orgasmic sounds coming from Layup, Don and Mike. "This is the best steak I have ever eaten!" "It just melts in your mouth - I'm not exaggerating!!" "Oh My God, I'm going to cum" were the quotes from the three of them.
The pork? It was good, yes, but it's hard to enjoy a meal when the entrée you declined to order is causing those sorts of reactions. Yes, I was jealous. dammit. The portions were not large for any of us - which would come into play later.
We all ordered dessert - great - and then we all ordered Absinthe, an after dinner drink. That may have been a mistake. I still don't know what goes in that - but they lit it on fire at the table. It was about 8 ounces in a goblet - and, of course, there were dares on the other side of the table to chug the drink.
So - we were well oiled as we left the beautiful Aria to go back to the Mirage. (Why don't we stay at the Aria some year???) . I'm not sure how it got so late, but the book was closed when I got back - and I had plenty of tickets to cash. They told me I could cash them at the main cage. Fine! I'll head over there.
Boy, that's a big mistake. I had 9 winners to cash..... the process to cash a winner at the cage involved multiple steps and stapling a receipt to each ticket. It took 15 minutes there to get the cash needed for the night.
I found the group at the baccarat table, where all 7 of us where going to "own" the table for the night. It started with the staff trying to open the table and the glass lid on the chips; their key would not work. We had to move to the corner table when the fun finally began.
First, the display went out. "Dongle not present" or some such error was on the baccarat display screen. With all of us buzzed (at least) or drunk, that message was the based of a few bad puns. After a while, a technician came over a fixed it; I offered to tip him a $5 chip for his effort. He was not allowed to take it. I offered again, again, and one more time. He was ready to pull the wrench out of his bag and whack me.
After another half hour, I look over at Layup. Uh oh. I see red splotches on his face and he is getting a bit bloated. He's having an allergic reaction. He says he feels fine, but will go and get some Benadryl from the store when the time is right.
Being the concerned brother I am, I stand up and go talk to the pit boss. I'm not drunk, but I'm not sober either.
"Yes, sir?"
yeah - my brother over there? He may be having an allergic reaction.
"What? Do you want me to call a doctor or the ambulance???"
No, no, no, God no. I just want to ask - do you have an Epi-Pen in case we need it?
"An Epi-Pen? Let me call a doctor now, sir!"
No, please, no, don't do that right now. Please lower your voice.
Too late. Layup found out what I was doing.
"What the F? I'm fine. Did you just ask her for an Epi-Pen?"
Well, yes, just to be sure.
"I'm fine....Jesus....ok, I'll go get some Benadryl"
Layup comes back with Benadryl - and peanuts and Beef Jerky!
"I'm still hungry from that meal!". He proceeds to open up the package at the table. "Anybody want some?"
Well, I guess, since it's here...sure.....
Layup passes it around, takes some more jerky - oh look, the cards are in front of him! He picks them up.
"Sir! No food at the table, please."
Layup moves his chair 5 feet back, stuffs the jerky in his mouth - and then leans far forward (with the chair away from the table) to check the cards. He mumbles something unintelligently as he lays down his natural 9......
The next 30 minutes was a battle between Layup, the beef jerky, and the pit boss trying to catch Layup in the act of eating.
We all ended the day around 2am - but I was starving after the pork and the alcohol. Time to go get a 3/4 lb burger at the Carnegie deli. Nothing better at 2 in the morning! Shared a few bites with Layup in the room (see Jim Gaffigan - "oh, I'll only have a bite.......MFBDBFDSHGFUISGIUSDG") and tried to sleep with all that in the stomach.
There is always one day of the trip that is the most memorable one, where the group picks this day as the day most representative of that years' trip. Most of the "signature" days come on a Friday or Saturday, such as the Golden Nugget day of 2007, the cabana day of 2008, the downtown day of 2012, etc. For whatever reason, Thursday turned out to be the signature day of the 2014 trip.
Up and at them around 8, 8:30 - and the first order of business was to obtain the annual gift to the group - the $10 Money Line bet on America's favorite hockey team! That was done around 9 as the early NCAA games started to tip off. Saw Todd and Ben with Ira in the book as they were watching the games; Todd proceeded (again) to introduce himself. I admire his ability to get hammered by halftime of the first ACC quarterfinal.
Back for the morning baccarat session with Ana, the Filipino; she kept giving me "5"s which is an average hand in baccarat; that resulted in a wash of a session. After breakfast - where everyone received various casino chips from New Zealand - we did a group run to the craps table. It was proven again that none of us could roll.
At about 11:30, we packed up and headed to our first golf round at Shadow Creek. Shadow is a course wholly owned by MGM for the use of the casino guests of their resorts. The day started out nicely with the two caddies coming up to the 5 of us and complimenting all of us - "usually, we get guys that can't hit the ball 100 yards". (Well, he hasn't seen my mid-round tee shot yet).
I was nervous as hell on the first tee. I had been working hard on the tee shot to be looser and more aggressive; there was water on the left (which is where I miss it if I overcook it) on the dogleg left opening hole. The range session was good - I stepped up to the first tee - picked out a spot on the right side of the fairway - prayed - and took the club back.
I finished through the ball and it took off on a line down the left side of the fairway, just missing a fairway bunker. Fairway hit, 270 yd tee hit. Holy shit.
The next shot was a full wedge that I put to 15 feet; I had an uphill putt to win the first hole for the team - but even though I missed it, I was so happy. Par on the first.
That was it for a while. The next tee shots were: 100 yards left (#2), 230 yd hook into the water (#3, #4), 80 yd worm burner into the weeds (#5), 100 yard pull (#6), ....
Well, so much for positive thinking.
On #14 or #15, I joked about what I did last year when I struggled - I threw the tee ball on the ground and teed off from the deck. Why don't I start here? It was a 470 yds par 4. I placed the ball on the turf - and whack - 240 down the middle. Par. Good drive on 16; 17 was a unbelievable par 3 which could resemble an elevated #12 at Augusta. I took at 8 iron - ball started right of the flag and drew in to the left-side pin position. Right on line.....
.... until it flew everything and into the back pond.
Oh well. Made a back-breaker 12 foot uphill putt for par on 18 to win money from Don and Wiz. Felt a bit better after hitting the last 3 fairways without a tee.
Two notes from the round:
- Someone was on fire on the front side, and it wasn't Wiz, Don, Mike or I. Leland came through with the career nine of 39 on the front at Shadow Creek. 2 birdies, was it? Great driving, excellent irons and no three putts. Awesome to see. I think he will retire from the game for 10 years after that round.
- Nothing worse than the battery dying on your phone when you are trying to track the Cincinnati/Central Florida under (largest over/under bet at 4 units) and America's favorite hockey team trying to protect a 3rd period, 1-goal lead. Mike and Leland were pissed at my constant requests for their phone on the last 3 holes.
The locker room was a shrine to current sports stars. There was the Michael Jordan locker. Mike Shanahan had a locker - which was the background for some pictures taken by the Skins fan in the group. And then we saw a large black man laid out on the couch, dressed in golf gear, watching the games. I thought nothing of it - until Wiz/Leland started to talk about him.
"You know who I think that was?". No.....
"That's Shannon Sharpe's brother! You know, the receiver?"
Sterling Sharpe? Yes, yes, that was him!
Sterling may have gained a few pounds since his playing days, but there he was, on the couch in the locker room. This concludes the 2014 version of "Celebrities we have seen gambling during our trip" (although there were reports of Montell Williams in the high-limit slot area this year).
We got back just in time to get ready for dinner, at Sage at the Aria. Hoo boy, what an adventure this was. Our reservation was at 7 - we got there in time, seated fine - and then it seemed that it took forever for the server to come over. And then the sommelier did not appear for a while. Our appetizers took a while to arrive.
The poor sommelier came over after the appetizers and Layup said very loudly and dryly "Well, thanks for showing up" or some such sarcastic remark. Ah, I see the alcohol was kicking in!
My choice for the entrée came down to the pork chops - which I do not get at ALL in China - or the flank steak. I asked the waitress - she recommended the pork. Wiz went with the pork also. Layup, Don and Mike all chose the steak.
The food came - well, let's just say there were orgasmic sounds coming from Layup, Don and Mike. "This is the best steak I have ever eaten!" "It just melts in your mouth - I'm not exaggerating!!" "Oh My God, I'm going to cum" were the quotes from the three of them.
The pork? It was good, yes, but it's hard to enjoy a meal when the entrée you declined to order is causing those sorts of reactions. Yes, I was jealous. dammit. The portions were not large for any of us - which would come into play later.
We all ordered dessert - great - and then we all ordered Absinthe, an after dinner drink. That may have been a mistake. I still don't know what goes in that - but they lit it on fire at the table. It was about 8 ounces in a goblet - and, of course, there were dares on the other side of the table to chug the drink.
So - we were well oiled as we left the beautiful Aria to go back to the Mirage. (Why don't we stay at the Aria some year???) . I'm not sure how it got so late, but the book was closed when I got back - and I had plenty of tickets to cash. They told me I could cash them at the main cage. Fine! I'll head over there.
Boy, that's a big mistake. I had 9 winners to cash..... the process to cash a winner at the cage involved multiple steps and stapling a receipt to each ticket. It took 15 minutes there to get the cash needed for the night.
I found the group at the baccarat table, where all 7 of us where going to "own" the table for the night. It started with the staff trying to open the table and the glass lid on the chips; their key would not work. We had to move to the corner table when the fun finally began.
First, the display went out. "Dongle not present" or some such error was on the baccarat display screen. With all of us buzzed (at least) or drunk, that message was the based of a few bad puns. After a while, a technician came over a fixed it; I offered to tip him a $5 chip for his effort. He was not allowed to take it. I offered again, again, and one more time. He was ready to pull the wrench out of his bag and whack me.
After another half hour, I look over at Layup. Uh oh. I see red splotches on his face and he is getting a bit bloated. He's having an allergic reaction. He says he feels fine, but will go and get some Benadryl from the store when the time is right.
Being the concerned brother I am, I stand up and go talk to the pit boss. I'm not drunk, but I'm not sober either.
"Yes, sir?"
yeah - my brother over there? He may be having an allergic reaction.
"What? Do you want me to call a doctor or the ambulance???"
No, no, no, God no. I just want to ask - do you have an Epi-Pen in case we need it?
"An Epi-Pen? Let me call a doctor now, sir!"
No, please, no, don't do that right now. Please lower your voice.
Too late. Layup found out what I was doing.
"What the F? I'm fine. Did you just ask her for an Epi-Pen?"
Well, yes, just to be sure.
"I'm fine....Jesus....ok, I'll go get some Benadryl"
Layup comes back with Benadryl - and peanuts and Beef Jerky!
"I'm still hungry from that meal!". He proceeds to open up the package at the table. "Anybody want some?"
Well, I guess, since it's here...sure.....
Layup passes it around, takes some more jerky - oh look, the cards are in front of him! He picks them up.
"Sir! No food at the table, please."
Layup moves his chair 5 feet back, stuffs the jerky in his mouth - and then leans far forward (with the chair away from the table) to check the cards. He mumbles something unintelligently as he lays down his natural 9......
The next 30 minutes was a battle between Layup, the beef jerky, and the pit boss trying to catch Layup in the act of eating.
We all ended the day around 2am - but I was starving after the pork and the alcohol. Time to go get a 3/4 lb burger at the Carnegie deli. Nothing better at 2 in the morning! Shared a few bites with Layup in the room (see Jim Gaffigan - "oh, I'll only have a bite.......MFBDBFDSHGFUISGIUSDG") and tried to sleep with all that in the stomach.
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