Vegas

I asked Carol a couple of months ago what she wanted for her birthday, and she said a trip to Vegas. So this past weekend we headed to Vegas. We headed out early on Satuday to beat the traffic. I love heading out Saturday morning instead of Friday night. Friday night you have to battle weekend traffic to get out of LA, arrive late that evening after an exhausting 6 hour drive, and then have to battle the long check in line. Ugh. Instead I leave at 7:00am on Saturday morning and get there around 11:00am, energized and ready to go for the entire day.

Stayed at the Mirage. I had some coupons to cover the room that weekend so decided to go back and check out the newly renovated rooms. Huge flat screen TV but still very small. I guess you can't really change the size of the rooms. Perfect for Carol and I, but a little too small for 4 guys. I guess I'm spoiled now after staying at the Palazzo in March.

Highlights from Saturday:
1. Sportsbook: Went 4-0 on sports wagering. Too bad the wagers were pretty small. Figures.
2. Palazzo: Went over to the Palazzo to play some craps. Um...wow. That's all I can say. The place was packed and the table limits were crazy high. Remember that this was on a Saturday afternoon, and there was one $15 craps table and the rest were $25 and $50. We could only find one $25 BJ table, the rest were $50-$500. All roulette tables were $25. What the heck happened since March? I was crushed.
3. Palazzo continued: So we went back to the Mirage to gamble and then returned to the Palazzo to have dinner. While at dinner we were amazed at how many women were walking by that were dressed like grade A prostitues. So after dinner, we went down to the 40-40 club just to people watch. We were camped out in the little sportsbook just outside of the 40-40 entrance and saw a gaggle of asian sluts walking our way. To my delight they stopped and asked Carol if she would take a picture for them, and for the first time ever I saw Carol with a totally pissed off and disgusted look on her face state "No, but maybe he will" as she pointed my way. Now, the one girl was only wearing a leopard print teddy, while one of the other girls wore jeans that were so low that her ass was sticking out of the top of the jeans and you could almost see the goods from the front side. Oh and that one was wearing a bra as a top. Crazy! Beyond words!!!
4. Oakland A's: On Saturday, I wore an A's shirt for the entire day. Just your basic A's shirt. And for some reason I got heckled multiple times. This was a first. Usually the only comments are "Hey you an A's fan"? This time I had a fat old lady eye ball me and say "Oakland? ugh" by which I had no response. Carol had a great response, but just a second too late. Then while walking from the Mirage over to Cesears, I was bum rushed by 5 white trash twenty five year olds who were obviously drunk. I thought I was going to get knifed. No joke. I almost yelled at Carol to run, that's how scared I was for 5 seconds as they were all running towards us. When they approached they were happy I was an A's fan and wanted to take my picture. So the six of us take a picture together. I was so confused. Note to self, don't go outside.
5. Rain: I always thought the worst smell ever was the stream of water running down Borbon Street during Mardi Graw. Nope. By far the worse smell ever was the steady stream of raw sewage running down Las Vegas Blvd after it rained for about 2 hours. The smell made my eyes water. Note to self, don't ever go outside.
6. Ultimate World Series of Poker: Is it a pre-requsite that you have to be a blabber mouth if you want to be a dealer of this game? GOD, everyone just shut up and deal the cards. I don't care about what your neighbors' kids did to their bikes in front of you house the other day. I just want you to flip over you hold cards. PLEASE!!! I know that you are 75 years old and have no one to talk to, but please just deal. And no, this was not the same dealer that Eric and I had back in March. More on him in a second.
7. Crowds- It seemed very packed on Saturday, but talking to one of the BJ pit bosses, he said that it is very slow at the tables. It looks like a lot of people, but no one is gambling. So much so that the Mirage's table limits stayed in the $10-$15 range. Pai Gow was at $25 in the evening, but whenever Carol and I wanted to play blackjack, there was an open $15 table. And they weren't the shuffle machines.
8. Crowds continued: The pit boss continued to state that they are getting a very large influx of Europeans and Asians now that the dollar is weak. They are also seeing a constant flow of 20 year olds, which makes many of the dealers upset because they tend to be drunk, but the pit boss stated that if it was specifically for the California 20 year olds, then the casinos would be dead right now. Then we talked for a while about how do these kids have $1000 to spend in the clubs. Very interesting conversation.
9. Pete Rose was signing autographs at Caesars. Hmmm, is that really a good idea?
10. Carol is the cooler when it comes to the wheel. Poor girl didn't get one spin the entire weekend. I kept on putting in money in the machine after she would play I almost always got a spin right after. It was pretty classic.

Sunday highlights
1. Mirage Craps- Woke up early to play some craps by myself. As usually the dealers sucked ass and I lost. Other than craps and the fact that there really isn't any place to grab a quick bit to eat, I really warming up to the Mirage again. Great sportsbook, great dealers, and the Beatles event is great for people watching.
2. Meza Grill: Went to Meza Grill for Brunch. No too bad. I think we need to try it out next year. We then went for a nice walk up the strip. Below are some comments on the casinos that we stopped in.
3. Caesars: So they now have a new pit called the Pussy Cat Club pit. They have about 10 BJ tables and some other games. Each dealer is a hot girl wearing a bikini. There are two stripper cages in the pit that have girls dancing. Very interesting. Table limits were $25-$50 and not a seat or a women player to be found. Very smart move!
4. Monte Carlo: I really like playing $5 craps at the Monte. The dealers are solid and the lighting is great. Carol and I had a great roll there, but then got killed at BJ. We had King Gooch as our BJ dealer. I wanted to punch him. This asshole kept on saying "there is no way that there still a ten" and then he flips a ten to give himself 21. He did this almost every hand and he won. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
5. New York New York- Wiz, what the hell is happening there? Half the casino is under major construction. We ended up just leaving and going to the Mandalay.
6. Mandalay Bay- Got pooped on by a bird, so had to get a new shirt. Great. Fuck this place. No gambling.
7. Shark Reef: Carol and I ended up taking a break and checking this place out. Sucked. Couldn't of been more disappointed.
8. Luxor- This place has totally changed since I was last there. Too dark and blue. And not blue as in sad, but blue as in the color. Very strange. No gambling here.
9. Is there a scarier place in Vegas than the area between the MGM and Planet Hollywood? We saw a large M&M standing outside getting his picture taken with two security guards by his side. Really? Is it that dangerous that the poor yellow M&M needs security? After Smith and Wolenskys it felt like I was in East LA. Wow.
10. Planet Hollywood- They have this BJ pit called "The Pleasure Pit" with strippers dancing behind the tables and girls in bikinis dealing. Once again it was all men and it was packed. So the question becomes, how hard is it to get 20 hot girls that are willing to dress in bikinis and are smart enough to deal BJ? Do they get paid more than the other dealers? Some get HR on the line.
11. Saw Jaws from the Bond Movies. I can't remember his name, but he was signing autographs in the mall section of Planet Hollywood. Sort of felt bad for him.
12. Ended up going back to the Mirage, canceling dinner over at the Venetian and playing Ultimate Poker right outside of the Revolutions club. It was just Carol, a guy from Encino, and myself and we had an amazing time. Carol started to get drunk and we were all just watching the sluts coming and going to the club. At certain points it was us three, plus the dealer, plus the pit boss, and the floor supervisor just laughing and making comments on the women standing outside of the club. Then out of nowhere, Shaq shows up. Now this is the second time I've seen Shaq and he is always smiling and waving and giving high fives. This guy absolutely loves his life. He was just walking around with a bunch of security, a couple of groupies, and some of his entourage. I got a wave and a head nod out of him. Then he vanished. Just like that....
13. Pai Gow- So Carol and I played a lot of Pai Gow at the Mirage. Once again we had a great table. We were playing with a 40 year old Korean brother and sister combo who had lots of money. Once they realized that Carol was a newbie, the brother kept on doing side bets on her hand. Carol made us and them a lot of money.
14. Pai Gow continued- Carol finds it funny that I talk to the cards...one by one. "OK ten, find your match. Where are you....AHHHH there you are." I think I annoy everyone else at the table since I really do just look at one card at a time and I'm always the last person to put my cards down. But that's how I like it so everyone else can F off.
15. Sportsbook- 5-0 again and I hit a parlay. So for the trip I ended up 9-0.
16. All in all a great evening. We were down to our last $100 and worked all the way back up to even!!!

Monday Highlights
1. Ugh. While waiting for Carol to get out of the bathroom in the casino I lost a quick $200 at Ultimate Poker. And this is when the idiot dealer that Eric loves was there. He made so many mistakes that the pit boss just stood over his shoulder for the remainder of his session. He cleared cards three different times on the guy next to me when he should of paid. He paid me once when it should of been a loss. The guys upstairs must of been going crazy.
2. Ugh. Lost another $200 at Pai Gow.
3. Ugh. Lost another $400 at Ultimate Poker. Carol got destroyed. She lost two monster hands that took the wind out of our sails.
4. It took 6 hours to get home. Brutal. The traffic was so bad we stopped at Primm outlets and casino. The Primm casino is the home of the highest wheel payout ever at $10 million. Also they have a rule of

Overall, an excellent trip. We need to come up with an alternative place to stay next year since the Palazzo was crazy expensive.

It's Golf Update Time

Yes, it's time for boring posts on the blog updating all of you readers about the tournament season. We've got 8 tournaments planned this year, starting next Tuesday.

The quick rundown:
1. Ohio Amateur Qualifier (Tuesday): Incredibly, I am paired up again with everyone's favorite Cincinnati Red, Chris Sabo. Will Sabo and his goggles bring our hero luck and a spot in the 103rd Ohio Amateur?
2. US Publinx Qualifier (June 18): 36 holes in one day at a course I don't particularly like.
3. Cincinnati Met (June 23-24): Can I please play well for 2 days in this event for once?
4. Vineyard Classic (June 28-29): Defending Champion of the 1st Flight!
5. Crooked Tree Club Championship (Late July): Defending my title.
6. Ohio Public Golfers Champ (Aug 4-8): A fun tournament, but this year at an actual challenging course - Cook's Creek.
7. Cinci Mid-Am (late August)
8. EAGL Cup (October), team event pitting courses against each other.

I've got no expectations this year. None. I still feel fairly rusty even though it's almost late May. The fact that we have had miserable weather that has limited my practice/playing time, combined with my vacation in early May (where I didn't touch clubs for 15 days) and the fact that I haven't broken 80 yet this year....well, I won't be surprised if I shoot 89 on Tuesday.

I've got a good warm up coming this weekend, as Don, Mike, Craig and I are playing a course called Purgatory in Indianapolis (from the back: 7700 yards, including a 741 yard par 5) and then on to the Purdue campus course on Saturday. Why Purdue? Well, next week it will be hosting the NCAA Division I tournament, and they have a limited amount of tee times for the course this Saturday - the last day for public play before practice rounds begin.

So we will be playing two extremely difficult courses this weekend with my game nowhere near where it needs to be.

However, if one wants to be extremely optimistic, there may be some parallels. 5 years ago I had little confidence going into the tournament season. I played a round in Green Bay a week before my first tournament and shot 87 or something at a track called Brown Deer. I played with my boss and a guy from the plant who played on the OL for the Badgers in college - he actually played in a Rose Bowl. Anyway, this ex-football player beat me on a few holes.

I hit balls after that debacle twice; I played a round that weekend as a warmup and shot 75.

Two days later, on May 19, 2003, I went out and did the unthinkable - shot a 69 in the US Open Local Qualifier to advance to the second round of qualifiying.
I still remember that round vividly - especially the last 6-7 holes.

Par 434 544 543 - 36 443 455 443 - 36 - 72
EZ 324 545 442 - 33 443 545 443 - 36 - 69

I remember the goose bumps on the 14th, where I had a 20 foot eagle putt to go to 4 under. I read the putt as a downhiller that would break about 6 inches to the right. I saw a spot about 5 feet from the hole on that line - and it would be a good starting point for the ball.
Steve was my caddy - he read it, and then we talked:
"I got the line for you....see that spot about 5 feet from the hole? That's it. It's downhill - all you gotta do is to hit the line".

I got chills right there - we agree on the line; I've been putting well all day......I'm going to eagle and then shit my pants.

I hit the putt......right after it left my putter, I knew it was in.

It hit the spot we both picked out....

and the ball did not move. It missed the hole by a good 5-6 inches. (Moral: again, when Eric and someone wholeheartedly agree on something, it must be wrong).

Two holes later, on an easy 370 yard par 4, I topped my drive and hit a 7 wood to 80 feet - and somehow 2 putted.

On 17 - I got to the green in 2 and left myself a 30 foot birdie putt - and had to ask Steve (twice?) where I was at in relation to par, since I wasn't sure whether to charge or lag the putt. I left the putt 3 feet short but somehow made the next one.

And then 18. Having an uphill 60 footer for birdie is not the ideal way to end the round, but I somehow 2 putted that, too.

That was 5 years ago this week. It seems like 20....

ESPN vs BSG

I know I'm a little late on this, but still an interesting article. And it looks as if he is starting up his own website. With that being said, his layout looks a little worse than the Hereford Nine site.

Now, I've become a huge fan of his podcasts so I hope he doesn't stop that, but I'm becoming less reliant on his articles on Page 2.

Easy Curves

While watching MTV this morning (Sunday at 10:00am) a commercial comes on advertising this wonderful product. First, what the F???? Secondly, what excellent ad placement.

Time-waster

For any of you out there mildly interested in politics, here is a link that will waste 10-15 minutes of your day.

Every presidential candidate's logo from 1960-2008.

Wow. I mean, who wasn't breathlessly anticipating the Bruce Babbitt-Pete DuPont showdown in 1988?

I still have my Perot '92 campaign button somewhere. I'll bring it to Vegas one of these years....

Election Thoughts

Back from vacation, and I've got a lot to blog about....but two quick things about last night's election:

1) Forget West Virginia. In a special congressional election in Mississippi (MS-01), the Republicans lost a seat to the Democrats. The incumbent Republican was appointed to fill Trent Lott's seat.

This district voted 60% for Bush in 2004 and reelected the Republican incumbent with over 60% in the last 4 congressional elections. And the Democrats won it last night.

2) This shocking exit poll result from West Virginia:

Obama only wins 53% of WV DEM PRIMARY VOTERS in a matchup with McCain.

This indicates major problems in the key appalachian states (Ohio, Pennsylvania, West Virginia) that Obama must win.

It is not hard to imagine a scenario where:
- McCain is elected President on the strength of winning Florida, Ohio, PA, and the south (including TX), and
- McCain would have negative coattails - for instance, the Democrats gaining 40-50 seats in the House and 5-7 seats in the Senate.

These sort of special elections that occur 6-9 months before a Novmeber election usually do mean things. There were signs in 1994 (when the Republican revolution occurred) and 2006 (when the D's retook Congress). This loss in Mississippi does not bode well at all for the Republicans. The brand is shot - for many reasons. I will ponitificate on that in a future post.

Decisions

Fitting that this is the first post in over a week.

The other day I headed off to work at around 6:00am. I stopped at Starbucks to pick up a cup of coffee and then it hits me...The four pound burrito from last night is knocking at the door to leave for the day. So I postpone the order of coffee and go straight to the restroom. Now I typically have very nice things to say about Starbucks, but their restroom setup sucks. Without fail, someone always knocks on the door right as I go in, since they only have one bathroom. This causes me to rush and either I pee over myself or I don't fully enjoy my private time. And yes, I do understand that it is a public restroom, but that is usually the time I can catch up on my text messages and internet. Man I sound like a twelve year old.

So I go into the restroom and prepare the toilet for my adventure. I sit down and realize that there is a newspaper sitting next to the toilet. I thought for a solid 15 seconds on if I should pick it up and read it or just let it be. Below are the thoughts that ran through my head:

• Well it is the Sports page and from what I can see they have an interesting article about one of my fantasy baseball guys, Billsingley
• How dirty could the newspaper be?
• Can I catch the HIV by touching that?
• Doesn't look like there is any pee on it.

So I end up picking it up and reading it. I felt so dirty afterwards, but I feel like I made the right decision.

Random Notes

Some random thoughts:

1. Freddie is in machine-pitch baseball this year (the "Orange Crush" is his team name) and unlike last year, I am not helping to coach. With the travel I have had and the baby, I deceided against it.

Well, I can't do it. I can't sit idly by while the coach dones't realize what he isn't teaching.

Case in point. The five practices that I have been to consist of:
- infield practice - having players field and throw to first
- taking some people into the outfield to catch
- and taking turns batting against the machine.

All good activities! But no pracitce of game situations. So what happens? First game on Saturday, the first batter for the other team hits a ball into the outfield.

Our players kind of stood there. The closest outfielder went out to get the ball ---- and then held it. No one covered second. Our coach was yelling at the players.
Uh - hello? You never practiced this! What do you really expect???

(And then he had the gall to "coach" one of ourplayers who was playing SS- man on 1st, 1 out; ground ball right to him. He correctly ran over and touched second for the out. The coach says - "hey! Next time, touch the bag and then throw to 1st!" . Wow. Don't worry about walking before we can run - let's teach them the 6-3 double play!)

2. Let's go Cavs! Let's go Cavs!

2a. Let's go Hawks? Let's go Hawks!

( I can dream, can't I?)

3. The Tribe - ugh. Where is the offense? The pitching - if you think the Sabathia and Lee switched bodies - has not been bad. All our bats are in a slump. The Minnesota series was terrible. And then we can't score runs off of Wang (understandable) and Mussina (huh?).

That said, if we can get out of April only 3 back - I'll take it. It's like hitting a ball in the water and escaping with a bogey.

4. I had a post all set in my mind where I would compare something to Lance Armstrong - and not in a good way. I do not consider Lance Armstrong a good role model. Strong people do not acquire fame, then divorce his wife and leave his kids for the celebrity life and start dating Sheryl Crow. So I call BS on all this Livestrong crap.

But then I forgot what the original subject was. Oh well, carry on. (And this is not a rip on divorce - I know I'm treading on very thin ice here, because there is at least one reader who is divorced. Of course divorce is acceptable and shoudl be enocuraged in some cases...... but the specifics of the Armstrong situation just does not sit well with me.)

5. I'm NOT feeling good about the GOP's chances in November. McCain may win - because of the Clinton-Obama drama - but downballot? They will get smoked! They are almost losing congressional races in the deep south! That's scary.

My lines right now:

Democratic nominee:

Obama -130
Clinton +115
Gore +800

Head-to-head:

Obama -110
McCain -110

Clinton 100
McCain -115

House over/under:
Net D pickup over 25.5 -110
Net D pickup under 25.5 -110

Senate over/under
Net D pickup over 4.5 -110
Net D pickup under 4.5 -110

6. It's not often - ok, never - that I post an article from a Democrat that I agree with.

Well, there's a first time for everything.

I didn't vote for you, Sen. Brown, in 2006, but that may change in 2012....

Laws of a Hot Roll

In Iowa this week, I was fortunate enough to be part of one of those "legendary" hot rolls that happen maybe once a year, if lucky. (I think this was comparable, if not better, than the Red Rock 07 craps run a few of us had.) What makes a hot roll?

1. Hot Rolls are born, not made. Try as we might (I'm looking at you, Layup), you can't force a hot roll. Loudly saying "c'mon shooter, warm em up" is not going to make 3 points in a row instantly happen. There is no reason why the shooter on the other side of the table is going to get hot. It just will be or it won't be. It's a divine hand making it happen.

2. The pace of hot rolls are moderately fast. The roll in Iowa this week was almost a tad too fast; I almost felt rushed to get a bet down. However, all hot rolls I have been a part of have a brisk pace. The dice are collected, bets are paid, the dice go to the shooter, and the shooter picks them up and rolls. No fooling around - no pauses to be found.

THink about it. We have all seen craps shooters that get the dice, take 15 seconds to rotate the dice so they show "6-6" or some such nonsense, then they tap the dice twice or thrice on the table, and then yell some Yiddish as they throw the dice.
Those shooters are annoying - and have you EVER seen ONE of them be a part of a hot roll?

3. Everyone is winning at the table. Come bets are winning. Numbers are being made all over the place. The main point is hit 7, 8, 9 times. Hard ways are thrown. Every conceivable betting mechanism of betting with the roller is winning.

4. There are three or four 7's thrown in the middle on a come out roll. So someone is rolling for 15 minutes, and he hit 3 points in a row. Bam! 7! Winner! 7! Another winner! 7! Another winner! Then off we go again - an 8, many numbers, and then another 8. The shooter truly did get all of his 7's out at the right time.

5. You lose track of time; there are no doubts, and no questions being asked. It's very similar to being "in the zone" athetically. This is the time to put triple odds - he's hitting it. Let's go $52 across. $5 hardways. There is no doubt - none - and there are no questions being asked when the money comes back to you. You expect it, and you've got to take advatage of it.

5a. Personal note: I've got to press more. I'm starting to finally learn this. The roller rolled six 5's in about 10 rolls. I didn't press until the 4th time, and then again the 6th time. And he kept hitting 5's consistently. $21, $28 at a time being slide my way. I've got to press sooner (but not at the beginning) when things are going well.

6. No one is counting money. I do this a lot. At the end of a roll - I usually do a quick check to see how much I made that roll/that point. Butin a truly hot roll, there is no time. You put the pass line bet down, something for the dealers - and before you know it, a point is established and off you go again. There's no time to catch your breath - which is essential.

7. If you approach a hot table in the middle of the roll, don't start up conversations with the players. Let's take this from the player's perspective. I am in the middle of a process that repeats every 20 seconds and has 2 distinct steps:
a. Waiting for a number to be called that is not "seven", and
b. Bending down and picking up the profit that is being slid to me.

In the various activities I could be doing in life, this is pretty high up there on the "favorites" list. So if you - someone who has not been involved at this table to begin with - want to stirke up a conversation with me - it better involve:
a. Sexual favors, or
b. Higher sums of money than what I am picking up every 20 seconds.

Idle chat like "so, how long has this guy been rolling" will get you an evil stare every time.

The Dark Side

Hmmmm. I'm looking in your direction Jorge Blogsada? Where were you yesterday.

Audience Participation

A question for the readers...

Say you are a Democrat....let's say, a 50-year old white married woman who has a blue collar husband. You live in Pennsylvania. You agonized over your vote between Obama and Hillary, and - for whatever reason - chose Hillary.

You go into the pools, vote for Hillary, and exit.

As you exit, a 20-year-old man, possibly with an Abercrombie & Fitch T-Shirt and cargo shorts and most probably a college student, with an i-Pod, approaches you with a clipboard. He asks you to participate in an exit poll.

What would you do?
Would you:
1) Decline?
2) Or would you agree to answer - and what would you tell the college pollster?

Houston

I find it pretty funny that the Rockets are all up in arms over the Flop Call last night, when they have the player that took it to another level in college. That's right, Shane Battier plays for the Rockets and he was the king of the flop back in his Duke days. So I really have a tough time feeling bad for the Rockets. Great game though.

Some additional quick thoughts on the NBA playoffs:

1. The NBA playoffs usually peek my interest and I start watching more games, but this year I'm just overwhelmed with the amount of good first round match ups. The Wiz-Cavs series is turning into the Heat-Knicks of the past. Lebron is just taking it to another level. This has been an outstanding series so far and one that I will make sure I watch from here on out.
2. NO-Mavs- This is one that I wanted to put money down, but didn't and now I'm shooting myself. This is a case of going against public opinion. I have yet to hear one person take New Orleans in this series, which was a red flag. Watching that first game it was obvious that New Orleans will take this series in 5 games.
3. Suns-Spurs- Easily the best 1st round match up ever.
4. Lakers-Nugs- If the Nugs could just play one ounce of defense...but they can't which means that Luke Walton will go for 20 each night. How embarrassing. Luke freaking Walton is lighting up your team on a nightly basis.
5. Philly-Detroit- I don't think I'm cheering for another team to lose more than Detroit. I hate the way that they play and I would just like to see them exit early. Despite losing game one, I still think that they will take the series.
6. Will a Lakers Celtics matchup create more hype on ESPN than Colts-Pats?
7. Why is it that I enjoy all the laughing and joking that goes on with the TNT crew, but hate it when it is the ESPN, Fox, or CBS football crews?

Happy Schedule Day!

Big day today! The 2008 NFL Schedule comes out at 2 pm Eastern!

This is the day when we can start preparing for the fall - what weekend to block out here in Cincinnati, perusing possible road trips back up to Cleveland, and to figure out if there is a good game to take the kids. Last year was perfect - a non-divisional, 1 pm start in early October (so no weather problems): I took Freddie to the Miami game and it went wonderfully. This year's home schedule, however, doesn't look to be kid friendly:
- I don't want to take him to a divisional game yet;
- Dallas and New York at home? Hmmm.......could be too ugly
- Indy? I'll go only if Layup wears a "I love Jim Sorgi" t-shirt
- Tennessee? Those frauds
- Denver? Maybe.

I expect the Browns to have at least 2 prime time games this year - whether on Sunday or Monday night, possibly on Thursday. Some early rumors:

- Week 1 is rumored to be at home vs. Dallas at 4 pm for the FOX national game; this would be the first time Joe Buck would be in Cleveland for a Browns game - in fact, I think it would be the first time in 30 years that the lead NFC crew would be in Cleveland. Pat Summerall/John Madden never made it to Cleveland.
- Rumors of a possible Thanksgiving night matchup at home vs. Pittsburgh. Now there's a game where you hide the kids....

That's it...no more

No more Joe Bo. That's it. I can't take it any more.

Betancourt.....Perez.....hell, even Lewis....anyone but Borowski.

Hello Friends....Sunday ramblings

Happy Master's Sunday!!! Hope everyone is inside and lounging on the couch today watching the pros hack up the course.

• PGA Golf Pool- This by far is probably the best gambling pool I have ever been in. My interest in golf has increased ten fold. I'm starting to learn the announcers by name and voice, know all of the low end golfers, and watch more golf than usual, even if Tiger is not involved.


• On that note, fuck Justin Rose. YOU SUCK!!! Your performance on Friday puts you in the Rutgers realm. I will always root against you from here on out.


• Am I the only one who thinks that Jim Nance should only do golf? He is perfect as the host for golf. Its obvious he knows what he is talking about, and his soft voice is perfect. But this doesn't translate into football and college basketball. I absolutely hate him for these two sports, but love him for the Masters. I'm trying to think if there is anyone else that falls into this type of category?


• Did anyone notice Chad Campbell's "hat tan line" from the Houston Open? It was one of the most disturbing things I have ever seen. His forehead, which was covered by his hat for pure white, while the rest of his face was all burnt from the sun. I thought something was wrong with my TV at the beginning, but then realized that it was an actual hat tan line. Ugh....


• Eric pointed out to me this morning that Vin Scully was the 18th hole announcer at the Masters back in the 70s. WOW!!! What a treat.


• Who can get Masters' tickets? Actually let me rephrase this. What normal person can get Masters' tickets? There is a guy that I used to work with who could get Masters' tickets, but the guy is such a tool, there is no way I would ever travel back East to go. And we all know about Eric's friend Kenny.
• And I think we can all agree that Immelman's wife has officially taken over Michelson's wife as the hottest wife in golf.

Hillary Clinton = Herm Edwards?

Most casual NFL fans remember the ending of a game back in 1977 between the Giants and the Eagles. The Giants were up 6 or so with 30 seconds on the clock; they had the ball at their own 20 and all they had to do was to run out the clock........

Barack Obama can see the finish line. All he has to do is run out the clock. Some even say that Hillary's only hope is to wish for a monumental error by Obama - lacking that, there's no way she wins.

Well...........

"You go into these small towns in Pennsylvania and, like a lot of small towns in the Midwest, the jobs have been gone now for 25 years and nothing's replaced them," Obama said. "And they fell through the Clinton Administration, and the Bush Administration, and each successive administration has said that somehow these communities are gonna regenerate and they have not. And it's not surprising then they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren't like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations."

I have failed to appreciate how big of a deal this truly is until today. You have one last primary - Pennsylvania - that has a TON of rural, blue-collar, lower-middle class workers as voters. Those voters are pro-gun and mostly pro-religion. And you say that they hold those beliefs because they are bitter? They just turned to God in 1992 when the recession hit? Did Jesus die in 1987 - and before that Pennsylvania was not a religious state?

How could he willing say something so....snobbish? (Note the "they"s that he uses). Note the way he infers that guns or religion or anti-immigrant is wrong and something to be explained away.... "Now you really don't believe in that religion stuff,right Mr. Voter?" How out of touch can he be?

Do any Democrats study history from, oh, 1988? People do not elect politicans who they perceive to be out of touch. How many examples do people need?

1988: Dukakis in the tank.

1992: George HW Bush going to a grocery store and was amazed at the scanner.

2004: John Kerry windsurfing on his vacation

And now 2008: Barack Obama thinks the only reason those pro-gun, God-fearing people believe in that crap is because they are "frustrated". If only the economy was better, these poeple would see the light and would back us on gun control! And they'd see no need for Jesus!

And they'd be for free-trade just like us enlightened people! (Oh wait - we just had a primary in Ohio where Barack and Hillary tried to compete in the "I Hate NAFTA the most" contest". How again does Barack's statement above jive with the Ohio campaign.

So now this is the opening for Hillary. I should say, Hillary "I LOVE The NRA! Yes I Do!" Clinton:

She described herself as a pro-gun churchgoer, recalling that her father taught her how to shoot a gun when she was a young girl and said that her faith “is the faith of my parents and my grandparents.”

Oh my God. From 1999: Stepping up the Clinton Administration's campaign against gun violence, Hillary Rodham Clinton used an emotional White House ceremony today to call on Americans to press Congress to ''buck the gun lobby'' and pass several gun control measures.

But enough about Hillary. This is about Obama - he has dropped the ball big time. The statement above actually puts into words the concerns that some Democrats have about Obama - he can't win the needed swing states like Ohio, Pennsylvania and Michigan because of beliefs like this.

Basically - the concern is that Obama is a snob and can't win outside the "latte liberal" vote. He is George McGovern, 40 years later. The main problem: he can't hide it, Hillary knows this weekness and has the trump card that is the complete opposite of Obama - her husband.

Obama has dropped the ball late in the game. Will Hillary pick up the ball and run for a miracle win - just like Herm Edwards 30 years ago?

Leave Brittany Alone!!!

What is up with the MLB? Leave Canseco alone. Especially in the bathroom.

Ramblings

Its been a long time since the last Larry King type post. As I drink my morning cup of coffee and procrastinate my morning run, here are a few thoughts:

• Was woken up this morning at 7:15 by a call from Ben. He was just calling me to tell me that he was putting a Decepticon logo on his car. Um..excuse me? You called me on Saturday morning to tell me this? And my response to him? "Megatron is a whiny bitch." And then I hung up. Ugh.
• Then I get a text from Ben at 9:30am telling me he just pulled over a van with 7 transsexual illegal alien prostitutes seeking asylum in the US. Called him immediately and verify and it was true. He said that he will be stuck doing paperwork on this for days.
• Yesterday the supervisors in my Auto Physical Damage department had an interview with a potential candidate for an open position. Two of them come running into my office telling me that they had a candidate that they wanted to hire immediately. Their manager was on vacation that day, so they wanted me to talk to her to see if we could hire her. Well, she comes into my office and she is no older than 22 years old. On a normal scale of 1-10 she was about a 6.5, but in their department where their jobs are to work with Body Shops to get cars fixed, she was a 10 in their eyes. And not to be sexist, but young women rarely do well in this type of position. Well as I talk to her, I see why the guys were getting so excited. She was wearing a white button down shirt and she kept on scratching her chest. No not her boobs, but right above it, still requiring her to somewhat open up the button down shirt. And she only did this when I was making eye contact with her. Nice little trick girly. So I ended the interview after 10 minutes since there was no substance to her responses and walked her out. As I returned into my office, the supervisors were sitting there waiting for me like little puppies waiting for their food. "You guys are idiots. No way." This started a 15 minute argument on the subject with the supervisors, with them debating with me like it was for a presidential election. I agreed that we would bring her back in and have a second interview with the manager and have her go out on a ride a long with one of the more tenured employees. Its amazing that these guys would sacrifice their annual raise, just to bring in an average looking girl.
• We just missed Heidi and Spencer at the Palazzo. Apparently they were there on March 26th, and had a huge argument at Dos Caminos. How great would it of been if we were there for that!!!
• Note to Don and Mike: Italian wines under investigation!!! But more importantly to Eric, Jon, and I, they found the same type of health issues with their cheese. Noooooooo!
• Pleasantly surprised on how good I am Legend started out, but upset on how it ended. Not good at all.
• As I posted before, I'm up for a big promotion. Well I am one step closer. I was asked to step into the position in an acting role for the next three months. And the VP stated that once I hit all of my objectives, the promotion goes through. Well, I'm at 2 out of 4 right now, and I should hit the 3rd one later next week. This leaves me with one last one.
• Went out and golfed last weekend at sunrise. What a disaster!! My game has gone to shit. My drives and long irons were fine, but everything else was a disaster. 39 putts on top of only hitting 3 greens in regulation. Posted a 99 on a very easy course. Will be spending the next couple of weeks working on my chipping and putting.
• Hellboy II is coming out this summer. Loved the first one.

Why wait?

That's right, why wait until next year to go back out to Vegas. Anyone up for a long weekend (Arrive Friday night and leave Monday morning) during the football season?

I hate my state sometimes

So - you are on a committee to bring a casino to Ohio. Good!
You'd like to create an advertising campaign to get people in support of your proposal. Good again!
And you'd like to use a fictional TV character to help you get the word out in commercials. OK - sounds good, but you better make the right choice!

Who do you choose?

Do you choose Corporal Klinger (played by Jamie Farr, Ohio native)? No.
Do you choose Cliff Huxtable?
Do you choose Cliff Clavin? George Costanza?

No. You make this choice.

What the hell were these people thinking? Did the clock turn back to 1989 when I wasn't looking?